Slanted truth in the words we blur like this...

Fade Away

2012-01-25T13:15:00.000-05:00

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. People come into your life everyday, you say "good morning", you say "good evening", some stay for a few minutes, some stay for a few months, some a year, others a whole lifetime. No matter who it is, you meet and then you part."

The above quote speaks for itself. Story of my life. Story of our lives. Honestly, I'd never thought of this years back. I always felt like people stayed forever. Friendships lasted forever. That nothing would change and everything could be perfect. Like the movies. Well, I was a kid back then and I watched alot of Bollywood too, I suppose. Happy-endings, happy-times, forever together, etc. etc. But, lets just be realistic now, things can't be like that. They just cant. I've personally never seen it that way.People WILL leave no matter what. It's one of the those things my sister gave me as an advice and I argued with the statement and said, "That's not possible, I'm pretty sure I'll be here forever and I'm going to be friends with these people forever" Next thing I know, I've shifted across the border and everything's changed gradually.

Well, not getting too cynical about this, it's not like people you know now are completely going to isolate you and just not be friends later. But, what I mean is.. everyone's not going to BE THERE. Like, next to you,physically or even emotionally. You might change countries, you might change schools or even people, including ourselves might just change before you even know it. At some point in our lives, we're gonna part ways and our relationships will differ a little, time to time. Fade or just change for the better or worse. Nothing remains the same. Just make the best out of everything I guess.

I tend to get disappointed when my relationships with people change or have faded away. But everyone learns the hard way, nothing lasts forever. Again, I really don't mean it the cynical way. It's basically what I've personally undergone. Change is one of the only things that is constant. Everything changes, fades, dissolve.

Writing is influential

2012-01-18T08:53:00.002-05:00

My friend started his blog and we're new friends but oh well, he's a great writer. Check his blog out HERE.

Writing is influential, so is reading. So are a lot of things. I can't seem to explain how much writing and reading has helped me. More like, writing has turned into one of my those outlets to express myself. Opened my mind through a million little things, learning different perceptions, different worlds. A lot of people don't get it. But well, once you do, It's a beautiful thing.

“Writing isn’t letters on paper. It’s communication. It’s memory.”

—	Isaac Marion, Warm Bodies

"I love stories. I love reading stories, I love writing stories, I love telling stories, I love how you can pick up a book and be transported to Middle Earth, 19th century London, Narnia, Hogwarts or any other time or place in history. I love how all your worries and cares disappear just by turning a page. I love how characters can become best friends at a time when you have no one else. I love the escape, the chance to be someone else, somewhere else for a little while. It's refreshing. We all need stories."

“Everything in life is writable if you have the imagination and the outgoing guts to do it.”

—	Sylvia Plath

'Bête Noire' or Fear itself.

2012-01-13T12:39:00.002-05:00

Fear, defined as "A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger,evil,pain,etc. Whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid."

I assume everyone's experienced fear at some point in their lives. Most of us probably live with fear everyday. Unknowingly or Knowingly. It's one of those natural emotions I guess; Fear of heights, Fear of water, Fear of Death, Fear of God, Fear of love, Fear of losing someone, Fear of swimming, etc,etc.

I intensely live with the fear of expressing myself in front of new people or even just a crowd. Also termed as 'Stage Fright' or just being shy for the simple.
I tend to chicken out, panic or just go through this rush of feelings when I'm supposed to be speaking in front of a crowd or to be making conversation with a group of people. I unknowingly get shy, self conscious;more like sheepish when i'm with people I'm not yet comfortable with. I take a lot of time to open up, to express myself the way I want to. And did I mention of how much this bothers me?
I envy the people who are able to make great conversations around a group of people, joke around without a pinch of coyness, talk confidently, argue when they know they're right, speak their mind out, speak in front of a crowd to express their thoughts, Oh, how much I envy people like that!

"You see something scary, you should stand up and step toward it, not away from it. Instinctively, Reflexively, in a ranging fury." -Lee Child (Echo Burning)

I can talk a lot, with people I know, I can be completely hyper with the people I'm used to. But, I'm too tired of not being able to speak out in public; with the act of speech, talk, conversations, communication. And, it's not that I haven't been on stage or been a part of speeches. As a matter of fact, I have been on stage a couple of times with shaking legs and a racing heart. I've spoken before the mic many times; not for debates as such, but for simple speeches and presentations and have experienced interviewing people holding a much higher post than me. But yet, the fear wont go away. I get awfully scared and nervous when asked to speak on something in front of a crowd or if I'm just supposed to be talking to a group of people, being how I should be. I yet don't voice my opinion when needed or speak out. I yet wont fight back, I yet cant express myself the way I should be, completely.

Once, a friend of mine tells me ; "You're just so worried about people's judgements" And it stroke me then, maybe I am worried about that, maybe I do care too much, not exactly knowingly, but unknowingly. Worried about what people will think, talk, say, etc,etc.
Call it weakness or fear. I'd say its a portion of both. I'm trying and I will continue to until I overcome this aversion, overcome stage fright, overcome this shyness, this meekness; cause once Lucas Scott's voice cover said; "Robert Louis Stevenson once wrote;'You cannot run away from a weakness;you must sometimes fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now, and where you stand?"

I'm trying to fight this out.

They'll judge it like they know about me and you.

2012-01-03T08:01:00.008-05:00

Silence was taking over, past midnight. Our arms were clasped into each other, sharing a long hug. I tiptoed to fill the gap between our heights, but the inner vibrations from filling the gap and from the beats of a racing heart, he bent down instead. But, well the tiptoeing is cute I suppose.
It was just a 'hug' but, sometimes little things mean much, feel much. Silence hadn't felt so alluring in a long time and if a star above the midnight sky would grant me a wish, I'd wish for this to last. Wish nothing came in between of us this time, wish nothing would go wrong this time although I know there could be a million little things that could. And foremost,I'd wish for this little bond to stretch its elastics to a never ending one.
I don't know what this was, it had its perfect moments but was yet imperfect in every way. Although I like imperfect, this was different. I don't exactly know what this was, but I'd say I liked it in a way. The moment had to end, but well, I'd play it over and over again until the mind begs me to stop.

In a typical case, this could mean 'something', but in our case, I was almost sure this wasn't 'something'. This was me and him. Something that hadn't worked out over the past times. Something that broke too easily. Something that shouldn't be looked back upon. Something that shouldn't be given any chances anymore. But yet, with the feeling of hope, I hanker to myself aimlessly, that sometime it will, not soon, but well, someday. Who knows?

My kryptonite, my weakness.
Something I should be quite over by now.

Apart from the daily chronic

2011-12-12T10:30:00.000-05:00

We're sitting in class, while the hallway is breathing silence with a phone ring interrupting the quietness once a while. It's quiet, not like the usual days. It's peaceful, after a long time. I like the idea of free classes, it means we could do anything, without being restricted to one subject, one lesson, one book. I have this strange liking towards these times, these moments. Bored, but peaceful. You're sitting in the silence, as a little of life goes on around. Life's beautiful like that in a way, A weird way, but still nice. Something that occurs only once a while, it's not the daily routine and I like being apart from the daily routine once a while.
No teacher running her mouth, trying to explain to us the numbers, definitions, etc. No doubts of confused students, no watching over the time to when the class would finish, no interrupting thoughts as the lecture is still on. You're just there, everyone's involved in their work, silently or in little whispers here and there,voices of footsteps at the hallway and echoes of soft voices from teachers across the staff room. I'm free to myself, in class, with no intention of really studying anything, no restrictions to what you're supposed to be thinking, writing or reading and that's what makes me write this.
I like this once a while, being apart from the daily routine, experiencing a day at school that's not very typical or classes that are not typical, for that matter.
A senior enters our class, "Why is this class so dead and quiet suddenly? bring some life" No one really answered, I'd say we all were a little too involved in the progress of our thoughts and the life that lies inside of them. A classmate reminds us of only 3 minutes remaining for the next class, another girl wakes up from her dreams, a chair falls, the bell rings, there's noise again. The normal routine is settling in again and I have to make my way to math class, whining about how much I hate math classes, I collect my books and walk straight to class. The moment's over. We're back to the typical routine. The daily chronic has knocked in again. Sigh.

The thoughts of my lost mind

2011-11-27T06:34:00.000-05:00

It's like I'm moving, but with no direction, you know? Like, I'm living everyday just like any other, with not so much on my mind, clouded thoughts and mixed feelings.

I start to wonder, What am I doing? What's my purpose? And I seem to be so lost in the search of its answer.
Sometimes, I begin to wonder where I'd been for so long? Did I lose trace somewhere or is this just some bizarre dream? Nothing and A lot goes through my mind, past and future concerns, while the present makes its way through the passage of today. I feel like I've lost inspiration somewhere. The inspiration that once was there, where did that go? I feel like a there's something missing, like a place waiting to be filled, like a picture waiting to be painted or an empty book waiting to be written.

Maybe Its a phase, a mood or just life like this. I'll just figure it out on my way, along the mysteries that surround.

A musical connection

2011-09-29T09:13:00.002-04:00

I love how music can make you feel; feel like a particular moment. You know when you listen to a song after a long time, feeling the same way you felt when you first heard it? Or reminding you of the time you heard that song earlier, on a passing moment, just simply bringing back memories of the past. Flashbacks.

During my summer in the states, the radio would constantly blow up with GIVE ME EVERYTHING TONIGHT, That song would play almost all the time. During our night drive from Boston to Bloomfield or our long ride to Florida, listening to the song now gives me the flashbacks of the moments spent there. The drive, the little conversations and passing sights. The cold the night got as we let ourselves free at the Boston Harbors walking fountain and how we longed for warmth the entire ride back home. Clinging to all the warmth we could find, continuously listening to the radio, passing by cars and falling asleep as the music continues and cars pass by.

Where Rainbows End; by Cecelia Ahern, by favorite book yet. That book has everything I could ever wish for in a book. While reading it; about a year ago or so; I would have my earphones plugged on listening to the songs from Taylor Swift's latest album then; Speak Now. While flipping through pages, the songs would change ever three to four minutes, somehow managing to almost collide with the story in the perfect lines of the song.

Long live the walls we crashed through; while the kingdom lights shined just for me and you; I was screaming long live all the magic we made..

That's why every time I listen to some of those songs, it takes me back, back to when I was reading that book, back to that story in those pages, back to where rainbows end, back to how enlightened I was reading that book. Or when it takes me back to one of the best parties; the music, the dance; the people, the surrounding and that time. How very beautiful.

There's actually something really special about songs; and moments that they encounter. No matter how long its been, I'll never forget the moment when someone I fancy would sing a particular song continuously; instantly that song plays; the face appears to my mind; thoughts revolve.

I'm tryin' to forget; but I'm addicted to you, but I wanted and I needed I'm addicted to you..

" Music is a total constant. That's why we have such a strong visceral connection to it, you know? Because a song can take you back instantly to a moment, or a place or even a person. No matter what else has changed in you or the world, that one song stays the same, just like that moment."

The similar way I feel about photographs. Those are the kind of things that will never change. Just remain like that, untouched in a way. In a way, that they make us relive memories. Listen, Look and smile. Smile at how it felt then, smile at how time flew, laugh at the jokes told then, laugh at how you were then. Some are the memories of pain and some of laughter. Bittersweet memories.

The lights and the people. The city.

2011-08-18T07:06:00.001-04:00

It took us almost an hour from Long Island to Manhattan. From the car, a couple of areas resembled the life and structure of Mumbai. The people walking in constant speed and direction, the lights, the garbage on the roadside and the entire life around made me wanna say "Hey, this looks just like Bombay"

We first stopped by at Rockefeller Center, a place dedicated to one of the richest man in the olden times of america. The place was pleasant. Huge and thronged with tourists, each one of them taking photos and chirping with their giggles, the surrounding was a happy one, but I really wished my brother was there too. The place centered around cafes and shops and an immense fountain, with the sound of water falling.

Later, driving through Times Square, the place everyone talks about. We were there, finally. The place was literally displaced by a surge of people walking all around. I was quite amazed by the life around, it was actually pleasing. I liked it. Tall buildings, illuminated lights and a crazy storm of people. Yes, this was, exactly what the city was all about.

We walked out of the car, walked through the busy streets. I was completely in love with it already. We kept moving forward, taking snapshots of our passing memories. We went through a couple of places, from the Disney store to The Broadway, which was flooded with uncountable number of people. It was almost 12 am, but the atmosphere around, felt like it was yet an early hour of the night. After an hour so, we kept walking, towards the car again.

Walking through the streets, some people were walking alone, others gathered in twos, threes and groups. Sights of varied nationalities including a lot of Asians. Sounds of combined languages, some familiar, some not understandable at all. It was rich and alive, bursting at the seams with colour, light and sound. People were flowing here, there, everywhere.

We stopped by 'The Halal Guys' , a group of Lebanese guys with some amazing food by the fountain. Witnessed drunkards and whores. A guy rapping, on an attempt to entertain the crowd in the long awaited Que by the Halal guys. Cute guys, gentlemen, students, families and beggars. It was like the whole world in one place. It's funny, how we all belong to different nationalities and cultures. At first, we appear to be so different from one another. But yet, we commonly share the same ties of bonds, the same emotions, everyday of our lives. It's like we're all connected in some way or the other. No matter what nation, culture, religion, all seem to share the same strings of life.

Books are like magic.

2011-06-22T13:57:00.002-04:00

"I believe in the magic of books. I believe that during certain periods in our life we are drawn to particular books-whether its strolling down the aisles of a bookshop with no idea whatsoever of what it is that we want to read and suddenly finding the most perfect , most wonderfully suitable book staring at us right in the face. Or a chance meeting with a stranger or friend who recommends a book we would never originally reach for. Books have the ability to find their own way into our lives.."
-Cecelia Ahern

You know why I love this lady? Because she speaks my thoughts. Because almost all books she's written takes me to another world. Wait, that happens almost with every book I read but she's one of the writers who I'd love to meet and talk with. She's one of my favorite's and then then there are 2-3 who come under that list too.

I love how books can inspire you so much, I love how just one story can take you to another world and make you learn so much from it. I love how they can teach you things you had never learnt earlier. Sometimes, I feel like I've learned way from these novels than school. I don't like books with too much fiction or too much romance. I don't like books that involve a lot of supernatural stuff. I don't like books that include way too much romance or old boring high school drama. I don't like books that include too much science. I don't like books that are about murders and finding out this clue to the next..

I love books that speak to you. I love books that are realistic, books that you could relate to. Books that bring out the best in everything, from drama to suspense, to romance. All in one, you know? I love the kind of books that won't always have a typical ending.I love books that surprise me with the enchantment they hold in those pages.
Right now, I really really need to buy a few Sarah Dessen books, I've read about her and her books and I really think I'd love her books. Can't wait to buy them. Also, if anyone could suggest a few books that I may like, please let me know.

P.S : I have this fantasy of going to Ireland and all the more, after reading Cecelia Ahern books, her stories always take place in Ireland. Also,Ireland is known for it's writers . I have this feeling that, the place must be so inspiring, I really wanna go there. Someday. Psst, the Irish accent is SO HOT.

People always leave, eventually.

2011-06-07T11:37:00.001-04:00

She stood there facing him. It was half past 8, at night. She was there standing front of him with her heart pounding and beating faster than the usual. There were more than just butterflies in her stomach. There were sparks every time he touched her. Every time he put his hand around her. Every time he leaned down to hug her and make her feel that he was there, there to apologize for what had happened a few days earlier. It felt more and less like a dream. Something she'd probably really wanted, wished for, after she had lost all hope on him, decided to let go of him. She thought they'd never work out and that he wouldn't care less, she thought again, again that people lie and people do leave. But, there he was, to her surprise standing there hugging her. Making her insides do somersaults.
"Please don't leave me"
"I wont, hopefully, I love you, and I'm sorry for everything"
He hugged her, she felt assured. She believed in those lines he muttered. Little did she know that the little thing she started to believe in was gonna end in 2 weeks.She wished those minutes lasted forever. She wished she could hold on to them for a longer time. She wished he had meant those words he said. She wished that it was not the same, just like before. And, as the memories washed away, she plays them over and over again on replay. She believes in the clear notion that people do leave, people drift apart, that some things could never last and that you can't trust everyone so easily, that it's not easy to let people in, cause when some of them, they get in somehow, without your permission and when they leave, the memories they leave keep playing over and over again. She couldn't imagine how different her life would have been without him. She liked it and hated it at the same time. But, there are no regrets. Even though, when she thinks to herself whether it ever meant something to him, but, nonetheless, it meant something to her. Maybe that was the silver lining of the dark cloudy story, meeting him, knowing him and most importantly, falling in 'love' with him.

Outside that flat screen television

2011-05-26T07:05:00.000-04:00

There's no limit to what you can dream. You can expect the unexpected, you believe in magic, in fairytales and in possibilities. Then you grow older and that innocence is shattered and somewhere along the way the reality of life gets in the way and you're hit by realization.

You know how life can't be like the movies? You know how everything can't be a 'happily-ever-after'? You know how characters in the walks of your life won't just come running back to you? You know how people will eventually leave no matter what they say? You know how the hero and heroine can't always be together? You know how even when things break apart can't come back together? You know how you can't find the pieces to your puzzle? You know how two people just can't be together no matter what, and no fairy-tales work? You know how people just can't change overnight? You know how villains CANNOT become good people in a day or two? You know how it can't just perfectly rain there at that moment? You know how every moment cannot have a background music to it, not ANY moment, EVERY MOMENT? You know how your hero is not gonna wait there outside your window? You know how someday out of the blue no one's just gonna come knocking on your door? You know how your best friend living miles and miles away can't just take a plane and come to you when you need her the most, right next to you? You know how you can't just sit there and cry all the time on your bed and magically everything's gonna be okay? You know how whores cannot just become decent fella girls overnight? You know how you can't just start dancing and singing whenever you want? You know how a 'yes' cannot magically turn into a 'no'? You know how EVERY dream can't just come true? You know how peace is not 'a piece of cake'? You know how people can ACTUALLY be really heartless sometimes? You know how anyone cannot just gift you the most perfect thing you've always been longing for? You know how you can't get EVERYTHING you want? YOU KNOW HOW LIFE CAN'T BE A MOVIE OR A SITCOM OR A SHOW. BECAUSE, IT'S LIFE. YOU KNOW SMALL WORD, BIG THINGS? It gets sad, it gets in the way of your path, it makes you happy, it storms you with hurricanes, it throws you up and then straight down, it lifts you up, it teaches you patience, it doesn't let anything just happen, it hits you late, it hits you now. Sometimes, life gets sad; life gets happy but, whatsoever, it is by far the most beautiful thing ever.

Art Auction; what talent, what an experience.

2011-05-09T06:52:00.003-04:00

Marsha Sinetar once wrote; “Life's up and downs provide windows of opportunity to determine your values and goals - Think of using all obstacles as stepping stones to build the life you want” I think what she said can be true in my case, my life wasn't as beautiful as it is now. 2 years back I hated this place and I was under this cave of depression and my mom kept telling me 'what can you do? this was destiny, we had to come here under certain circumstances, all you can do is make the best out of it, god has something in mind, he's gonna show you your way, he doesn't just do things like that' And I was all like, yeah okay you know it's been so long and then I began to fathom over the words of my mother, i do have doors opened, i do have things to be happy about, life is different and beautiful, things have changed so much for the betterment of everything. You see how God does that, it's wonderful and I wonder why don't atheists believe in God. ( No offence, if there's an atheist reading this)

So anyway, coming to one of my most recent and amazing opportunity, you know the whole thing about being a freelance writer has changed a lot of things. So, I went for this 'Art Auction for Humanity' by Benefit Arabia Organization to get any feature for any of the supplements. I found out about the event through facebook long back and was in contact with the organizers who also gave me a press pass for this thing which I'm probably gonna keep intact with me since it's my very first press pass and wearing it that day I felt so proud of myself.

It was a Monday and I reached the Westin Hotel Ballroom at 7 and the watchman opens the door for me and gives me way and guides me inside to the main hall. I talk to the young girl at the counter, write down my name in the media page and then get my badge, I felt good. I look around, I'm scared, I'm not sure how to start so I just randomly move about around the hall since not many were there at that moment. I look around at a few paintings and pictures, the waitress continuously offers beverages and cakes and all I had was a Kiwi drink.

I could barely figure out who could be the artist for the pictures, I didn't see any one really standing with their work. Just random people here and there, all so confident, beautiful and with some company. I felt weird, I felt envious, I wanted to have that confidence I lacked. I envied how some girls could carry themselves so gracefully, I really wish I could present myself like that. Then, I ask this one volunteer about the artists who were supposed to be there, she guides me to one and says that they were still to come. I decide to go to this artist/photographer who was talking to someone else at that moment, in my eyes, the person he was talking to, was a reporter. Looked like you know, tall lady with a recorder in her hand. I observed for awhile. Then, later when I went by, I was still scared inside, I still go up to him, introduce myself, ask him questions and take pictures of his work and him and get his card. It took less than 10 minutes for sure, and I wasn't really satisfied with myself, not at all.

Later, I see the crowd increases, there's also a live artist at the centre of the ballroom, drawing his picture. To cool myself a bit, I just stare at what he does, take a few shots, etc. Then, Later, I go past the work of different people, then I come along this photographer; to be honest, he caught my eye fifteen minutes prior to when I found out that he was standing there for his work. Yes, he was cute. Well, then I go up to him, introduce and talk, this time a little less shy. He seemed all sweet and so interested in when the issue for this story could come out. I fnish talking and taking pictures and then move away.
Mir Anwar; He was this New York based wedding photographer, raised in Jeddah/, his work there was mainly the places in Jeddah, pretty much significant to his childhood spent here.

Then, as time passes I go around, take pictures, meet other artists or photographers and begin to have the confidence in myself. I met great people, each with such amazing perceptions and thoughts and creativity, out of all my favorite was this 20 something girl, she was beautiful photographer, she pursued photography during one of her summers in Paris. She confesses that she's always been afraid to take pictures of nature, or rather can't take pictures of nature. Later, she asked her instructor, and he said "You don't need to only take pictures of nature, you can combine.." that thought stuck in her mind, she pondered over a leaf at home and soon came up with her own ideas to portray nature. Her photographers looked so difference and anomalous, I was so impressed. She was so far the only one who I spoke to SO much and all her photographs made so much sense to me. She studied photography during one of her summers since she felt the vibe of photography because of her artistic family background. Her photographs were mainly centred around the idea of self expression and emotion. Each photograph depicted her feelings inside, her perceptions of life and the things around her.

The Tree Whisperer
This basically shows that; the tree is whispering to the human but we must speak with our souls since nature doesn't understand our language, hence the mouth was photoshopped.

'Mother's Identity'
The wires she's used, depict a nest which shows the identity of a mother. And overall, the picture shows that; a mother doesn't really need her senses to recognize her own children.

More pictures by her;

There are more pictures, but then, that would make my post too long than it actually is. There were in total of 7-10 artists I interviewed, 6of them being photographers. This whole event was so inspiring in all aspects and the people present there, were amazing, I really had a great time there, all by myself :)

Oh, and did i mention that the youngest participant there was a 6 year old? I was so shocked and surprised. And, I'm doing a cover story on her for the children's magazine :) such great talent and such an age.

There are like more pictures I'd like to post of the other paintings and work, but I decide to do that regularly with each post I write, a picture with its depiction.

Oh, and here's the article I wrote related to the event.

http://www.saudigazette.com.sa/index.cfm?method=home.regcon&contentID=2011050199571&archiveissuedate=01/05/2011

Looking inside

2011-04-18T10:48:00.000-04:00

We live in a world where we are mostly judged on the basis of our appearances. I mean seriously, what's with the world? It's so utterly messed up.We cannot judge the book by the cover right? Think about it, looking for a book at a bookstore, don't we usually read the overview given on the back cover of the book rather than just taking it just cause it's cover was all so funky and beautiful. Well, maybe there are people who do that, but most of us, we judge the book on it's overview, what the book was all about, what's its story, okay, we might end up being wrong about it sometimes and sometimes, it offers us so much and there's so much more than that little write up on the book, there's so much more than that cover, to that story. Some books happen to change our lives in such profound ways.

Opportunities like this..

2011-04-05T06:27:00.002-04:00

I've been wanting to do this post for a very long time but I had pre finals and all that. Anyways, so well, in January and 3 of my friends visited this press, The Saudi Gazette to interview this lady out there who is the head of the ladies department since we were doing a presentation on Women in Saudi Arabia as we were told in school to do a presentation on anything we wish, and I decided that we could do something different, not just the usual topics people were doing so with a little research and talking about where we could visit and accordingly, we chose our topic. So, anyways, we were nervous and we had no idea who we were going to interview, all we knew was it was going to be a lady. We entered there through the security and then someone took us to the main office and we were told to be seated in the conference room. We took our places, whispering all our doubts out and then in about five minutes, The lady arrived, she looked like she was in the beginning of her thirties and she was this smiling woman in her hijab and looked like a Saudi Woman but later we learned that, she was originally from Pakistan married to an Arab.So, she was partially an Arab staying here for about more than 15 years.

We started off with our introduction followed by our questions and apart from what we needed to know, we asked several questions on what we wanted to know and it was all so great, she's like one of the most amazing women I've met. Her strength, her determination to her work and her modesty, she inspired each one of us in different ways. After about an hour, we were done with our interview, and then she asked us to meet the managing editor and talk to him too, then we were directed to the Managing Editor's office, we went inside and he was this really friendly man, he gave us a few copies of the magazines he had on the table and then generally talking, he asked if any one of us were interested in writing for them as freelancers, and right then I'm like "I am" and then he asked me to come to the office on the following monday at 4pm for their meeting.

The following Monday, I went by to the office, I was really nervous, cause I was all alone and I felt good though, more like grown up too. As I entered there, I was a little late and the meeting had already begun. When I entered the conference room, all I saw were people much older than me. I took my seat somewhere next to a lady, this arab head was speaking about the new things they want to implement in the papers and about their new ideas, after he finished, I was asked to introduce myself, and then the head left and we were left, like around 11-12 people comprising of both men and women belonging to mixed nations , all of them looked about 30 except this girl who looked like she was probably 20 and this other guy around the same age.
Now, i didn't know what the meeting was all about, later each one of them started discussing the stories they have for each of the supplements. There are weekly supplements each which comes out along with the newspaper daily. Sports Plus, Time out, Expat life, Business Plus, Education Plus, The Fresh Fashion Magazine and Funtimes. So this particular meeting for freelancers was basically for discussing the stories we have for these supplements mainly concentrating on featured stories and events. While discussing, I saw that everyone had their stories and stuff, and I was all confused about what I'm I gonna say? Then, while this lady was talking about school events .. and what she said was about a school event which is you know, the usual.. sports day and stuff, which get slotted in the Funtime Magazine which is mainly for kids and covers those school events and then it clicked me that, I had been to this Hi-tech fair at The British International School since I had friends out there, I had gone there hoping for something more entertaining with my friends, but none of them really turned up and I ended up going alone with a couple of kids who were going for my compound, and that day I thought to myself that I had wasted 3 hours in that fair where it was all this tech savy stuff, new innovations by students and workshops, etc, luckily I did have 2 of my friends out there representing their game stall but yet, at the end of the day I thought it was a complete waste of time, and then i decided to tell them about that event, and boom, they told me to do that as a feature for The Education Plus, and I'm just like wow.
I was asked to mail the story by the given deadline, however, I wasn't sure how to go about writing the feature, so my first article was a challenge, I had to speak to my friends who represented their stall and through them i got in contact with the event manager of the school and got my pictures and collecting all the information, I had like three tries, cause each time I was told to add more details as it was a featured story and not an event report, I learned so much from it, and then successfully submitted my first article and jumped and smiled when I saw my by line in the newspaper. The only challenging part so far, is finding out stories and events happening around you and here they don't publicize a lot of things, so finding out stories is the challenging part but this is such a great experience. And that moment I knew, that the things which happen to us, the things that make no sense at some point, they'll make sense one day, and that everything does happen for a reason.

MY FIRST ARTICLE
My Second Article, an interview with a saudi Business women

My Third Article, another interview, which was out in today's supplement

It tends to happen,a lot.

2011-03-18T08:26:00.000-04:00

It's so strange how things seem to change so fast, how people turn into another version of themselves..with all the changes and people around me, I wonder if I've changed too? Time changes everything, sometimes it heals things and sometimes worsens it. I hate how people who once cared don't seem to care at all anymore, it's so disturbing, the uncertainness of things, the uncertainness of people leaving, the uncertainness of feelings, the uncertainness of life itself.. I feel so lost right now, I can't express in proper words about the whereabouts of my thoughts. Thoughts are just gushing in and out , I wonder if I just misread things, maybe it's not what I think but, nothing at the moment satisfies me enough to change what I feel.

A phase..

2011-03-02T04:37:00.001-05:00

When you feel like writing down every single detail in your diary because you fear you'll forget it, you do forget it eventually after two years. You forget what hurt you that time, you forget what pissed you off so much that you cried, the things you remember THE MOST are the times that made you happy and sometimes, it's those little things that make you smile again. Of course some things hurt and you're gonna remember them but I think we all grow and learn eventually that life, is a balance of holding on and letting go and, time heals everything. And with the sad times, there are happy times to come. At one point someone would seem so important to you and now they're just a part of the other people you know. People come and people go, some come back, some stay, some don't bother anyway. Change is a huge part of our lives. We all go through our different phases.

So, I was going through old personal diaries cause I was planning to throw them all away since my little sister opened my present one and read some line from it. Dark secrets. So, I don't wanna take anymore chances, I mean i get it, I started writing cause I was alone when i just shifted and writing made me feel so much better, I didn't even have a blog back then. I wrote down everything, every time I got irritated and depressed, which was often two years back. And now reading back, I don't feel stupid but I feel like there were so many unnecessary little things in it and that's not the point, I started writing cause I fear I'll forget..but if the memories are priceless, they wont be forgotten. That's what makes life worth living. Those little moments you'd never forget. I don't wanna write down everything I'm living, I just want my life to be worth it , when i look back, I want it to make sense and I want to bring back those happy times I've had with so many of the people. So, I'm gonna stop with the diary, the one with everyday stuff, or depressed stuff or even happy stuff. I do realize it was a phase, you can't keep a diary forever, it may get lost, get in the hands of the wrong person, and you don't want that. I just wanna live with purpose and sense, and remember those memories I've had not read. Though if I get old I might forget, haha, but diaries don't last that long anyway.

"One day your life will flash before your eyes, make sure it's worth watching.."

The power of choice..

2011-02-18T09:53:00.000-05:00

"Actions are the seed of fate deeds grow into destiny" -Harry S Truman

I was never a believer of fate or destiny. I didn't firmly believe that everything was written or decided from before. I thought It would be stupid, why else would we work so hard to earn something? That can't be destiny. Then people shouldn't be blaming students for failure, it's destiny right? So, I never believed in destiny. I thought that was just a mere reason for people to say, " Hey, it's destiny"

So lately, I'd been in this fuddle that whether there was a destiny or not. Are things just meant to be sometimes? So, after a lot of discussions with people and a little bit of research, I come to the conclusion, that yeah, there is destiny, yes, some things are meant to happen, somethings are out of your control and they just happen. Like, it was my destiny to be here, in Saudi Arabia after coming back from India. There is destiny. But yeah, there are things which you can change, everything is written, what's going to happen is written, but we have the power of choice, the choice to do the right or wrong. The choice to go here or there, and our choices could change our destinies. But, something's are written for sure, whether you choose for it or not, some thing's are meant to happen, something like how two people just end up being together out of nowhere.

Destiny does not mean you just sit there and wait for it to happen, you make it happen, that's THE CHOICE you have. You decide whether you want it or not, you decide whether you'll work for it or not. You get what you give. Obviously, a murderer wouldn't just murder someone cause it is written in his destiny, it was the power of choice. It's said that we have been given the power of choice, and with the choices we make, we build our destinies, we do something bad or bad, we have to live with the residue of our choices and the consequences of our actions.

That beautiful thing

2011-02-09T15:24:00.001-05:00

It's funny how, when you love someone, you automatically ignore the imperfections, it all doesn't matter. Maybe that's why they say we must love everything around us, that way we wont find a number or flaws and complains, and we might just accept it as it is, cause at the end of it, you love it, right? That's what matters, there's a reason you love something, love someone, and that love can erase all the flaws and specks of what you love. So, they say love is beautiful, maybe it is, cause it looks beyond all the imperfections.

26/01/11

2011-02-02T09:11:00.000-05:00

Yet another disaster.. another disaster on the 26th of a month. It was supposed to be republic day and just to be a little bit patriotic i had planned on atleast wearing something which represented my country or something, but fail. As I woke up at 11 pm, cause of the loud thundering and the heavy rain tapping on the window glass.

For the first time ever in Jeddah, I disliked the rain. I wanted it to stop, It was getting way too heavy and disastrous. And, let you know, there is NO proper drainage system in Jeddah, since they do not expect rain, yeah, it's stupid but that's how it is. And, so the roads were flooded, people were stranded in streets, students and teachers stuck at school with no where to go. The rain did stop, after 5 hours. After 5 hours of continous rain, it was almost gonna get dark at that time, there was no electricity or water. Water had entered the house from the windows and the ground, we had been trying to clean the water for a very long and time and now we were tired. The sky looked weird, very. It looked like it was twilight or something. It was really different. Helicopters were flying above our houses, giving out help and trying to save the people in trouble. You could hear the ambulance voices and police cars all through the day, all night.

There were harrowing stories from every single person. One being my friend who came walking from this area, from school with water up to the waist and stuck for like 4 hours without food for the entire day. There were people stuck all through the night. It was horrible, really and it's high time they NEED to get a proper drainage system out here. It's funny how thing's can change just change like that, in no time. In just a matter of few hours, the entire city was on standstill. Be grateful for what ever you have, things can change like that. You never know.

The future which lies ahead..

2011-01-10T08:28:00.000-05:00

So this is the phase where everyone asks you, " So, what stream are you gonna take now?" " What do you plan to do ahead?" "What are you gonna do, science, commerce or arts?" My answer would usually be, "I'm thinking of pursuing fashion designing" But, now lately, I've been looking through colleges and other options in the same line, what if I change my mind later on, I must have options ready. So, I'm pretty sure I would end up doing something in the field of Fine Arts and other than that a lot people suggested me to do something like writing or something in the field of mass communications.So, Recently, I went up for a career guidance programme and I got 1. Mass Communications 2. Designing 3. Law and 4. Hotel Management. The councilwomen advised me that Mass Communications would be a very good option and Designing too but I'd have to work harder for it cause I do lack a few attributes, but I can always work on them. Out of the last two, I knew I would love to do either mass communications or designing, but yet I wanted my dream of a fashion designing to live on, so that was my first option. But, now looking through different things with different perceptions, I've thought about doing Fashion Communications, which is lately an upcoming career.

Fashion Communications covers a diversity of opportunities in marketing, advertising, public relations, and journalism and has long been considered one of the industry's untapped career resources. Students in this area study illustration, packaging, computer graphics, photography, and fashion event planning and production. Students get to participate in a unique and highly respected course of study. May it be a niche of visual merchandising, styling, graphic design, display and exhibit design or creative writing Fashion Communication enables a greenhorn to develop his skills by installing his identity in any of such areas to emphasize the assets of the fashion industry.

Now, this covers all my areas of interest, I know I would love to do this. But again, minds change. I have 2 years to decide. But, for now this is my option. My first. Fashion Designing is an option too. But the second for now. At first, I was like omg let me do both. But 4 years + 4 years= 8years :/ yeah, everything is not that easy. So yeah, I need everyone's opinion on this cause a part of me is still confused. Some people are like, "common you have two whole years to decide" But, two years pass by quick, before you know it, it's the next year already. And planning the future is not a bad thing no?

We are who we are

2010-12-06T09:55:00.000-05:00

We had this little activity in school, to speak about yourself, the strengths weaknesses and our fears and everything else we would like to say. I did say most of the things I wanted to, but I missed out on many as well, so here's it all. It's quite different from what I spoke but the main points are all included.

Sometimes, it's hard to introduce yourself because you know yourself so well that you don't know were to start with. Let me give a try to see what kind of image you have about me through my self description. I hope that my impression about me and your impression about me is not very different.
  There's something I've learnt from the writings of William Shakespeare which has strongly influenced me and my life.

There is a tide in the affairs of men.
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
On such a full sea are we now afloat,
And we must take the current when it serves,
Or lose our ventures.

Life is short and opportunities are rare and we have to be vigilant in protecting them. And not only the opportunities to succeed but, the opportunity to laugh, to see the enchantment in the world and to live, because life doesn't owe us anything, as a matter of fact, we owe something to the world. I hope I can do that, and I hope I can make a different, somewhere, even if it's just a little.

I like to write, I love reading and I love Art. I think it's this totally different way of expressing your feelings and emotions and it is so contrasting and antithetical.
I really hate science, somehow I can't seem to develop any interest in it no matter how hard I try, it's just really monotonous to study science.
   I love music, just like any other person. I don't know what I'd do without it, cause it inspires me so much..not learning or doing music but just the sound and the words of it, it's enchanting.

   I love One tree Hill, this one show which makes me feel like everything, I feel like a part of it, it's so real and it's stimulating, really.

Every Individual has their own set of strengths and weaknesses, it's up to the person to use their strengths constituently and convert their weaknesses into prospective strengths. To start with, one of my strengths would be forgiving people easily, well it could be a weakness too cause sometimes people tend to hurt us over and over again but that's a different case and I'l make sure that it shouldn't be a weakness at that point of time. Anyways, I tend to let go of things, let go of people's mistakes and that's mostly cause I really don't wanna lose someone and sometimes, we all happen to do wrong things and we all deserve to be forgiven. Though when someone's been really mean to me, I would totally hate her/him at that moment or just for awhile and then I just let it go, cause it's okay.
  Secondly, I have this creative mind. Wait, I'm not boasting and that's what people say.
Coming to my weaknesses, I'm not perfect you know and I'm glad I'm not, I'm glad I'm not perfect cause then I would have nothing to improve on, nothing to work on. It's funny that once, someone thought I was perfect, I'm NOT.
I'm really shy. Not as much as I used to be, but I still am. I take time to mingle with new people, once I get used to it, I get too talkative and hyper. I get nervous around new people or a crowd, I think too much about what they might think, I need to be more confident in doing things I want to, I'm trying to break through this shell. I get too sensitive and emotionally attached to people. And I often procrastinate.

I have the fear of letting in people, I can't trust someone very easily with everything, maybe just with a bit not everything. I'm scared of letting people too inside. And I fear of people and things drifting apart, nothing lasts forever. I'm scared of people leaving. People I care about. I have the fear of falling in love.

Once, we all graduate from our schools, we'll step into the real world and look for our identities further and the person I wanna be is someone who just doesn't design but creates a niche for herself in the Fashion Industry. I wanna pursue fashion designing as my main career and Fine Arts as an option and I also wanna study Mass communication which includes under advertising, event management, writing, etc.

Unknowingly, I'm inspired by my mother. I realize that after a really long time though. I know my mom's gone through a lot and she's strong and I know I get the influence from her. It's stimulating the way she fulfilled her dreams with such grace, I really hope that someday, I get to achieve what I want. When we stayed without my dad back in India for a couple of years cause of his work, but the way my mom worked for everything, the way she did every single thing for us independently, that is want inspires me. Sometimes, i guess unknowingly I get my strength from her. I love my dad no less and I really look up to the person he is. And my siblings, well I'm not saying much about them, i could go on and on. I love them all. And they're all partially responsible for the person I am.

I'll take my chances

2010-11-27T09:27:00.000-05:00

Do you think about the future? Or about the past? The "what if's" and "could have been's"
We all do right. We all regret something. Regret not saying something, regret doing something, regret NOT doing something.
"Regret comes in all shapes and sizes, some are small, like when we do a bad thing, for a good reason. Some are bigger, like when we let down a friend. Some of us escape the pains of regret by making the right choice. Some of us have a little time for regret, because we're looking forward to the future. Sometimes we have to fight to come in terms with the past. And sometimes we bury our regret, by promising to change our ways. But our biggest regrets are not for the things we did but for the things we didn't do and not the things we said but things we didn't say."
I mostly regret things I didn't say. Sometimes, I'm like "damn, I should have said that." Maybe it would have a made a difference. Even if just a tiny bit, but it would have. But now that's gone. That moment is lost. I can't get it back but I can make sure the next time I really wanna say something, I should be able to say it. My weakness lies in what other people think, what will other people say. But what I really need to do is overcome that weakness cause 'other people' shouldn't matter that much. All the 'other' people don't shape my life, I do. I NEED to open up.

We all have the expectations and assumptions we make about the future.
So, lately I've been thinking about the future. You know when people say forget the past and don't plan the future and live in the present. But, is future planning bad? Is thinking about the future bad? Should we just let it happen just the way it does or not?
I don't think thinking about the future is something bad. And about forgetting the past. Well, it's all worth remembering. Your life is worth remembering, worth being mattered hence it shouldn't be forgotten. Sure, we do wrong things, we went through things in the past but there's a reason all that happened and either you've gained or learned. Whatever it is, it is all a part of this life you're living.

My past is worth remembering, my present is worth living and my future is worth living for.

You know some people say that it's all fate's game or it's destiny, whatever happens just happens you can't help it. But if it really was like that, why would we work so hard to earn what we want? I'm not sure yet if our lives are written before hand or do we make our lives?

As a matter of fact, I believe that we make our lives and not because it's my destiny. We get what we give, what we deserve.

Let's just pretend and make wishes out of airplanes

2010-11-03T19:11:00.002-04:00

November is here. Finally. October somehow felt longer than the month before. Anyways, I'm so glad it's november. There are reasons why, there's a reason to everything right?

"Maybe there's a reason behind it all, we just don't know it yet" -G.Mattias

But, sometimes you can't find reasons. Atleast I can't. Some thing's just happen. No reason. But, everyone says that everything happens for a reason, EVERYTHING. I get why bad things happen but what about the usual things or happy things? I don't know what I'm talking about. Ugh. Confused. Okay, drop reasons.

I found this wishlist of mine when I was 10, the wishes were really like a typical 10 year old but the great part, they all almost came true! Seriously. I was like ''wow" so sometimes wishes do come true, even stupid ones. Except that when I was little, I wanted barbie to be real, yeah those things don't come true ;-) but my mom once told me that the barbie came into reality in the form of my little sister. She's big now. I mean she's 9! So anyways, whatever it is, wishes come true. Sometimes, something you really want. At some point of life you're gonna achieve it. Wishes are granted. So, here is my latest wish I made up in my mind, things I want, some are stupid silly ones and some are the serious ones. Nonetheless I would like it if few of them came true if not all :)

1. I really wanna figure out what I want. Sometimes I wander along my thoughts, sometimes I don't really know what I want.
2. I want the coming summer, that is from May 2011 to be awesome. I have a feeling it will be.
3. Wanna visit one Taylor Swift concert. Really wanna go for one.
4. I want to have pinkish streaks, the temporary ones, the one you can wash away I guess. And I just dont want them, I want them to suit me.
5. I wanna get close to all those friends who have drifted apart completely.
6.I wanna be a fashion designer, I wanna work hard for it so that, when I achieve that, all the hardwork pays off and it's gonna be worth it.
7. I wanna travel the world. Not right now but later, like after a couple of years probably with my husband. Hahaa. Random.
8. I DO NOT wanna procrastinate so much =P
9. I wanna stop the bitching and back-biting that sometimes I might intend to do too.
10. Apart from the fashion designing thing, if I don't make it through or even If I do, apart from that I wanna do something in Commercial Arts or photography or commercial arts itself. And, I wanna be a writer, a part time writer.

Oh and I really wanted to share the whole Breast Cancer campaign held here in Jeddah. Sadly, I couldn't go, I really wanted to though. But, it really was beautiful. It's said to have been the world's largest human ribbon. And what makes this greater is that they broke the record in a place like Saudi Arabia, where they say women don't have enough rights. And I know a lot of us staying here complain about the country often but really, look at the brighter sides. This place is really wonderful in it's own way. Two sides of a coin right? Anyways, I'm proud of what they did for creating awareness and making the whole campaign such a successful event :)

"Staging a massive all-women pink rally to raise awareness of breast cancer is a strong symbol in any country. In Saudia Arabia, it’s a historic feat. "

"Let it be known that as of this day, ignorance is no longer an excuse and no woman should be allowed to be left to suffer in silence," -Reema

All my thoughts run astray..

2010-10-26T09:31:00.002-04:00

My head's like a kite, all my thoughts run astray

I hate it when people misunderstand you.
I hate it when people are NEVER serious. I mean sometimes, you HAVE to be serious in life you know?
I hate it when people talk behind your back.
I love how one moment things are so blur and the next it's beautiful.
What i have learnt, is that expectations always end up in disappointments or sometimes far better than those expectations, something great happens.
Sometimes, thing's drift apart, i don't know how but time changes everything. Like I said earlier, change is the only thing that is constant.
I love these random upcoming bands. I think no matter what, most of them are hot. The way they play their instruments and everything, I think it's hot.
You know some people when they're all like " I don't like her, she's fat" Okay, so what? Does her/ him being fat change anything? NO, IT DOESN'T. Really, that annoys me. I mean you don't perfectly have the perfect body shape and even if you do, it doesn't give you the right to insult someone or judge someone on the way they look. Looks aren't everything. Your body isn't everything. Being Thin is not everything. Being fat is not a bad thing, it's one's personal's choice, the way they want to be. You can't just judge people like that. That's being immature. Inner beauty is what matters right? It's true that each one of wants to look beautiful but instead of always embracing your outside appearance, how about make that inner appearance more appealing?

*Cause you're amazing, just the way you are...*

Rumors. They always happen. Everywhere.
How can you trust someone saying something about someone else they themselves don't know?

Oh there are 100 something days for the end of grade 10. I'm happy in a way :D There's quite a lot I wanna do. I know I'm gonna miss it somehow even if I hated some moments but there have been good moments as well :) And few months after that My sister is gonna walk down the aisle like a pageant queen ;-) Haha, she's gonna be a bride. Wow. I'm so excited for obvious reasons. Though I really don't know how it's gonna be when she goes into this whole new family.

Anyways, It's my friend's birthday today. Not a very long friendship, I know him since a couple of months. Since summer to be exact. And things weren't really good between us,we were sort of drifting apart I guess. But now, everything is fine and I'm glad :) I spoke to him after long and it felt nice you know?
So yeah, this person is definitely not reading this hence I'm writing it.. He's actually this really nice person, I mean, he does things and he makes mistakes, but what doesn't make me hate him is the person he is entirely I guess? And because the first few times I met him, i could talk to him and stuff, when actually I would usually take some time to be with new people. I don't know him very very very well but how much ever I do it's not that bad :)
Once this other friend of mine told me " hey, to be honest, you can't just judge a person with his/her bad quality or the bad thing's he's done, everyone has their 'bad side' " Then, I asked him if he knew what his bad side of personality was and he said "No, I really don't or maybe I do, but I don't know what other people see, but it's cool you know,whatever it is" And after that little conversation, I started thinking about it really, most of us do judge a person with her bad qualities and well maybe, that's not right. No one could be completely bad right? You can't just hate someone unless he's done something bad to you and sometimes you can forget or forgive if the person apologizes and means it, cause that's how life is, we all make our mistakes, maybe some of us even repeat them but we all deserve to be forgiven at some point of our lives, I guess. And it's a fact, no one could be heartless really.

And, guess what? The third album by Taylor Swift, SPEAK NOW is out and I already have it, and it's amazing :)

*Don't say yes, runaway now.. I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the backdoor... don't wait or say a single vow, you need to hear me out and they said speak now ...*

*Your string of lights is still bright to me
Oh, who you are is not where you've been
You're still an innocent*

Cause It's not just a man's world and cause my mind just can't be stable

2010-10-13T10:34:00.001-04:00

"Being a women of two components "wo" and "men", as I understand it, women are a complementary word to men in the English language. When we look at the same word in French, we find "femme" and "homme". So, the common factor between the English word and the French word is the ending which means man. However, in Arabic.. amazingly, we find that "mar'a" stands for women and "rajoul" stands for man. That alone represents the fact that they are completely separate entities. This shows us that the Arabian civilization gave each species it's own value and identity.
People may say that religions, particularly Islam, have created divisions and wars around the world, and have diminished and discriminated the rights of women throughout time. I think this is an understated and incomprehensive view of our doctrines and roles in the world.
   Did we, as species, create our own niche and hook? Did we use the sword of femininity to kill our esteem and pride? Did we hold the light for others and burn ourselves in the name of sacrifice? (as I mentioned earlier about how different languages show different points of views on what women are)
   Needless to say, Islam has given each an equal and different entity which reflects the culture of the Islamic world. Where did we go wrong? In which turn of the road did we lose our dignity, pride, and role as a woman? Women have writen, throughout history, the story of men. They have nurtured them, raised them, and more importantly, ruled them subconsciously. Why do we fight with men every day to regain the rights that we never lost but misplaced?
  Women have and will rule the world by using their femininity as a weapon of peace and eternal equality. We do not want to fight to take the role of men, but we want to rise up from the deep sleep hypnosis, which was created by men themselves, to take part in engineering the politics of the world rather than marketing ourselves as products to sell.
Final Words:: respecting thyself will grant you nothing but sincere success."
   ~~Princess Basma Bint Saud Bin Abd Al-Aziz
This is just a bit about what Princess Basma lately wrote in one of her articles. It's true you know, people DO think and feel that the women have been discriminated from the men. They might have been differentiated in some areas, which is different. According to my knowledge, women rights are equivalent to the men. People misinterpret things. In Saudi Arabia itself, some extremist misinterpret the actual message, the actual truth and create pointless controversies about women. But, however.. It's the WOMEN who have to recognize their rights, and fight for it. Most of them don't even know their rights! It's important, who knows what's gonna happen in the coming.
   Anyways, jumping to another subject. Hypocrites are really bugging! Sadly, i come across a lot of them. I mean, why do people have to talk against about something they themselves do? Don't bitch about that thing or that girl when you do exact the same thing or are just like her!! Period.
   I've been getting those mood swings lately, typical I know, but yet.. Sometimes, especially during school hours and other than school as well ( not that much though).. I don't really feel like talking or anything for that matter. I don't even know exactly exactly why. Trusting issues or what? Things bug me, not really serious stuff though but just like a usual functional brain, the head is so occupied in the most random thoughts and some things which have happened. How different things would it be if I could stand up for myself properly? How different would it be If I could just be a bit more honest with a few people I don't like? And about all the possible things in the past, present and the coming. It's not that I wanna erase or edit my past, No, I don't. I like the way just the way it was, is. Okay, well we all dislike a lot of things in the present, in our lives.. But somehow I love the imperfection of my life. Happiness is fleeting and that's just how it is in the real world. I like that. There are dry times and the next moment, you couldn't have been happier. Priceless moments. Rain, just listening to the depth of your favorite song, just watching your favorite show or just having those little giggles with your family. Or even the happiness when you could make somebody's day or just making someone smile after they've been into a crash or just looking at photographs. Happiness is weird and random just like the way I'm writing this post, just the flow of thoughts on my mind is here on this post.

Fearless

2010-09-29T09:40:00.001-04:00

"To me fearless is not the absence of fear. It's not being completely unafraid. To me, fearless is having fears. Fearless is having doubts, lots of them. To me, fearless is living inspite of things that scare you to death. Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again, even though every time you've tried before, you've lost. It's fearless to have faith that someday things are gonna change. Fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can't breath without them. I think it's fearless to fall for your best friend even though he's in love with someone else. And when someone apologizes to you enough times for things they'll never stop doing. I think it's fearless to stop believing them. It's fearless to say you're NOT sorry, and walk away. I think, loving someone despite what people think is fearless. I think allowing yourself crying on the bathroom floor is fearless. Letting go is fearless. Then, moving on and being alright.. that's fearless too. But, no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. You have to believe in love stories and prince charmings and happily ever afters. That's why I write these songs cause I think love is FEARLESS."
-Taylor Swift
Okay, this girl is amazing. I'm a fan and I agree with what she quoted. It is true, you know we all get hurt at some point of our lives, more than once or twice by people we love in anyway. But that doesn't stop us from not trusting anyone else ahead. We just have to be cautious. I guess? Cause it's true, when someone breaks your trust especially when you least expected it, it hurts like hell.
I've been hurt quite a lot by different people in different kind of situations. At first, I was like "why me!?" but you realize with time that these experiences just make you a stronger person inside. Even though I might have thought that I have dissipated a few people, or just lost touch or whatever you call it. Now I feel I have so many more people, different people, nice people.

Recently, I was talking to this friend, about how fast year 10 is going by and all the stuff we have ahead of it. In a few months, most of our lives are gonna change. Completely. People are gonna move and most importantly grow up? Really, because changes always took place, it's the only thing that is so constant. But, after grade 8, changes, changes, changes, different experiences, very different and sometimes you feel like you're not even the exact same person anymore. Maybe you've turned into a better person or worse.
I'm really excited about the future, but who knows what lies ahead right? That's the best and worst part of life that you don't know what's gonna happen next. I love the present, no matter the drama or lies, my life is beautiful, everyone's is, everyone goes through their own battles but it's a part of god's tests and, the past is gone long back and there's nothing I can do to bring it back or change what it had, but there's the future and I'll try my best to make it beautiful and worth living for. I just wanna live a life I'm gonna remember, even if I don't write it down.
Someone once told me "you're lucky you have drama in your life, it's not boring." But it's annoying! Drama is on a pause right now. But rewind, so many lies, pointless fights, bitchiness, people hiding the truth but at the end of it all, I learn. And someone once wrote; "Not one moment is wasted in life, for even when you're alone, you learn"

Tick Tock. It's past 12 and that means it's my birthday finally :D

2010-09-08T18:57:00.001-04:00

Omg. I'm 15. Yes, today's my birthday :) I haven't well planned anything yet. I hope somebody else does. Haha. It's like an eid night so wont really be going out i don't know. I just hope it ends well :) I expected a few calls from a few people.. but no. Umm, I shouldn't even be having any expectations, cause it's always FAIL.
But yeah it's only past 12 and there's still the whole day left so yeah. And OMG, My best friend, Sejal from Pune.. this is the first time we aint together for my birthday so she called me up first to wish me and also she had secretly given my sister this handmade gift before I left, so I got to unwrap that and it was so amazing and it made my day. I LOVE her to death. And I got this extremely cute funny message from my guy best friend, Ishaan. I LOVE him. He's like the guy whose always been there for me and he always makes me smile when I'm all disturbed, upset or angry at something. And the message was totally original his style, Haha. Inside jokes. Sorry. Yeah so I just hope my birthday ends well, I feel big now. Haha. NO. I'm just really hyper now and have been listening to fifteen by taylor swift for so long!! I kinda relate to that song. Personal reasons. Anyways I'm off for now :)

That's her gift. I LOVE it. She's awesome cause she made it <3

Oh ma gawd!

2010-08-29T14:10:00.002-04:00

So, I've been away for a lot of time, I was in India for half of my vacation which was like FAIL. I expected so much and I got NIL. So, I was really waiting to get back to Jeddah even though I never liked this place a year back but now I really like it here :)

So, my trip was like weird.. too much shopping for my sister's marriage which will be after 6-7months but we don't really get that great Indian collection here and we don't know when we're travel to India again so hence all the advance shopping. Sort of boring though but the dresses part was fun. Ha. And jewelery and gold and all that diamonds stuff, it's so boring I tell you!! We were like sitting in this really boring gold-diamond shop and after an hour and a half they decide to buy this one necklace. I was like one hour and THIS! but, yeah whatever.
And omg talk about drama, my vacation had a lot of it! Friends drama, this drama, that drama. It was annoying but well in the end things were alright, my last day was so awesome!! I was with my guy best friend for half the day and we went up to this hill and then it started raining with all the lighting and thundering and then we got soaked. it was so awesome and later at night I was with my two girl besties, acting really hyper and all. So at the end it was not a really bad vacation really.. I met some people after really long and I really don't know when I would be seeing some of them next cause many of them are shifting to different places. So well, yeah. Enough with the personal talk.
Right now, I have this weird obsession with Katy Perry.. I mean oh my god, she's like so beautiful!! And besides that i love her new single, teenage dream. It's awesome.. I think she looks the best in that video. I agree she's a bit vulgar and stuff a lot of times but she's still really pretty and I like the way she talks and stuff.

Oh and like ramdhan's going on right. The fasting month.. I was in India when it just started .. it was cool didn't feel much like it though and then when I came here.. it's really lively here in Jeddah during ramdhan.. it's like vacation time plus during ramdhan, the whole day everything is closed and then it all opens after everyone's broken their fast, which is after sunset and everything properly opens at like 10 in the night, when the night prayers are done and everything's open till 5 in the morning. So, that's like really cool and well different from other places :) And the best part is no school for like 3weeks and more. I hate school, so not looking forward for it.. but the amazing part is this is my last year in the current school I'm in.. like not even a year, just 5-6 months and then I'm out and then school-less for like a few months and then I'll be doing my A levels in a british school which I'm very excited about though I'm scared about being a new girl and stuff but well thats a long time now. Right now I'm in the present, and it's not bad at all.Everything's going great and even if things are bad, its only for awhile.. Everything has it's own ups and downs and I think that's a great part of life.

"Happiness comes in many forms-in the company of good friends, in the feeling you get when someone else's dream comes true, or in the promise of hope renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy because you never know how fleeting that happiness might be." -One Tree Hill.

In my head

2010-08-07T14:12:00.001-04:00

'The important thing is not to be bitter over life´s disappointments. Learn to let go of the past, and recognize that every day won´t be sunny. And when you find yourself lost in the darkness of despair, remember, it´s only in the black of night that you see the stars, and those stars lead you back home.´

Dare you to move, like today never happened..

2010-07-30T15:56:00.002-04:00

You can choose to blame your circumstances on fate or bad luck or bad choices. Or you can fight back. Things aren't always going to be fair in the real world. That's just the way it is. But for the most part, you get what you give. Rest of your life is being shaped right now..with the dreams you chase, the choices you make and the person you decide to be. The rest of your life is a long time. And the rest of your life starts now!
   - One tree hill

I really love one tree hill, like really. I know many people think it's just another high school drama soap where people just break up and make out and stuff. But, believe me I don't even watch 90210 or gossip girl. But, I watch one tree hill. Sometimes, I feel I can relate to some part of the characters you know.
   I mean all of us do get confused, don't really know what to do, who to trust, what choices to make and what exactly to be. You know I have been going through this really weird phrase where some old friends have been drifting away. I mean they practically meant the world and I always thought nothing would change that but guess what, time just changed everything. In a space of just a few months, things have changed tremendously. It's depressing,really. When people you expect so much from, ditch you.
   I know, people say.. friends come and friends go, I always argued about that. I guess having expectations end up in disappointment. But, I can guarantee that out of all those friends there are a few who would never leave you and may not be there when you WANT them but are always there when you NEED them.
  And oh, you know FAKE people, those who think they're oh so cool. They piss me off! REALLY! Why do they need to pretend? why can't they just be themselves, as simple as that! BE YOURSELF. Nothing bad with that right.You're really cool that way.
   Apart, from all this crap, lately.. I have been facing too many changes as well. Well, some are good but most of it is just crap. I know everything's gonna fall into the right place at once but still. It hurts.
And OMG, I miss Jeddah. So surprising. I used to wait desperately to come to Pune. But I really wanna go back now. My sister and brother are coming back this time for a year, so it's gonna be so perfect. And I miss my friends back in my compound. We had some EPIC times. I still laugh randomly at the most random moments we have. They make me happy and they aint bitchy ;) we DON'T bitch or back-stab, not at all :D Just laugh and have some fun. And I'm glad I'm still gonna have like a month when I get back until school restarts. And right before I left, I made a couple of new friends out there and trust me,they are beyond amazing :)

Lost a few friends, gained a few. All for good?

To be myself tonight..

2010-07-13T10:25:00.002-04:00

Robert Louis Stevenson once said; " You cannot run away from your weakness,you must sometimes fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now, and where you stand?"

You know the time when you feel like you're the one left out. When you're the one thinking you can't fit in the crowd around you. Even when those people are no strangers anymore but your new friends you've been hanging out with over a month.
I'm shy. I take time to open up, I take time to express myself, I take time to be ME. It was all pretty normal until I meet this new character, this guy who knows all the people around me and is new to me. He's nice, he's so funny and a great guy but I take time right, with new people..to talk ,to open up. But it's kinda bugging me now, Im so sick of being shy all the time. Im so sick of being quiet around new people. I don't want to. I wanna be all hyper, free and talkative like how I am.

Waka Waka eh eh?

2010-07-05T12:25:00.001-04:00

My exams are over!! Ah, feels great. No school until the 20th of september, couldn't get any better :D And well, the Fifa matches, I can now watch them peacefully without having a book in my hand or worrying about what shit I'm gonna write in the next exam.

There's lot I wanted to write about, starting from the whole Fifa World Cup... This time obviously, it's been very surprising with Brazil and Argentina out of the world cup before the semi finals! That was a shock.KAKA is like the cutest thing ever. So Adorable. I hated it when he was all sad :( Brazil is my first favorite team so i felt so bad but worse was when Ghana lost :O It was like OMG. Cause they so deserved to win and they didn't all cause of the penalty shots! Hard luck! I wanted to cry when I saw Gyan cry. I mean, that was a moment for them, If they won they would have been the ONLY African team to qualify and in their own home continent, big moment, and they couldn't achieve it all cause of luck :( And, I don't like Uruguay much, the goal keeper was cute though :P

So, now it's pretty obvious Germany is taking the cup home but I still support Spain. I LOVE David Villa. Spain is my second favorite team and I really home they win. Though I know they wont. But I hope they do.
And, omg I so wanna watch the semi finals at the beach where they have these really huge screens and all the guys screaming and shouting. I really hope I can go, though the commentary would be in arabic -_-

Anyways, so summer has begun here. It's all holiday time, everyone is in holiday mood and so am I :D There are 10 days until I travel to India, Bombay and then Pune of course. I'm excited to meet my brother after 7 whole months! And of course my sister and my friends :) I hope this time things and bitches don't ruin my summer.
Well, so for these 10days out here, I have plans and I really home I can do whatever I WANT. Okay so here's the list :
1. Watch all the movies I want..Kickass, She's out of my league, The last song, etc.. and of course please so suggest a few good romantic comedies or any GOOD movie for me?
2. Watch One Tree Hill and ALL the seasons of How I met your mother :D
3. Go shoppping!! ( I need so many things!!)
4. Set my room, it's all re-painted so I gotta put back a few things left and change a few things :)
5. Blog :D Hahaha yeah.
6.Knit.Yes, I knit. And it's fun. I'm a beginner and so far it's great :)
7. READ BOOKS
8. And everything else which comes to my mind :D
And And And most importantly, When I reach India.. I wanna watch ECLIPSE. Love Robert Pattinson. Love Him.

Still walking..still searching

2010-06-28T06:50:00.002-04:00

And I still wonder...... what is the purpose of this life? what is the purpose of ME? And I yet don't have an answer. I'm confused. I don't know. I wanna know. Can I? Will I? What's the meaning? What's my purpose?

Inside jokes:: One of the best things about friendship :)

2010-06-16T10:53:00.002-04:00

Scene 1 : At Baskin Robins
'A' takes chocolate flakes, 'S' chooses cotton candy and 'Me' chooses Love potion.
Scene 2: In the car with S's parents
Me: I'm having the love potion, I'm gonna become all lovey dovey
A:: You already are woman!!
Me: No, I'm not.
A:: Of course you are.
Me: Okay, fine fine.
S: Maybe you'll turn into a heart :P
A: *laughs* What the hell?
Me: almost half of this ice cream's done, I haven't into a heart yet :P
S: Maybe it's effects are after you complete the entire thing.

Scene 3: The next day, at a party
Me:: hey do I look fat in this?
S: No you don't, or wait maybe it's coz of the love potion, you're kinda turning into a heart y'know
*Giggles*

Scene 4: After swimming, walking back home. Opposite S's villa now.
*'A' narrates an incident which was supposed to be 'funny'*
A:: And then.....blah blah blah blah... *laughs hardly*
* Me and S stare at her, stare at each other and then fake laugh*
A:: Never mind, Inside joke..inside joke.
S:: So why are you telling it outside? :P
Me:: *points at S's house* Okay, yallah ( arabic word ) lets go inside :P
*Everyone Laughs*
A:: Omg, that was the lamest joke ever!

Scene 5:: At Paris Gallery

S:: Omg, I love this watch
A:: Omg, yeah me too!!
S:: Haha, great minds think alike. How much is it for?
A:: Damn, its above 500 SR...S, you could buy me that.
S:: Hahaha, I'm as poor as you.
A::: Ah, great minds have the same salary!

Scene 6:: Random

S:: Whataya want from me?!!
Me: Bitch, please!

Scene 7:: Outside

Little girl to black guy :: Can you rap?
Black guy:: No! What, just coz I'm african and I'm black doesn't mean I can rap.
Little girl:: Of course you can, c'mmon you're like as cool as jay z, c'mmon rap!!

At Someone's house
*Talking something about rape*
Little girl:: what is rape?
Me:: Ummm, rapping!! Yes, rapping! It means rapping, you know, what you asked the black guy.
Little girl::: OHHHHH!!!
S:: omg, the next thing she does is asking the black guy if he knows how to rape!! HAAHAHAAAHHAA

Scene 8:: During the Brazil match yesterday.

Me:: (the tv aint clear..) What match is it.. *looks properly* BRA versus PAK...(reads R as A) ...what team is PAK....oh PAKISTAN!!!

A:: OMG, YOU NEED HELP!!
Me:: Huh?
S: It's okay kid, you're too lost.
Me:: Oh!!!! Of course, there's no Pakistan in football!

P.S:: I know it might not seem very funny to all you bloggers, but ya thats why they're called 'inside jokes' :P

Take a look at where you live, what if it happened there?

2010-06-06T08:39:00.002-04:00

'You probably think that it’s too far to even have to care
well take a look at where you live what if it happened there?
you have to know the urge to make a change lies within
and we can be the reason that they see the flag rise again'

For all those of you'll who don't know about what's happening in Gaza, It's been facing a lot of pain since any years by Israel. I don't understand ..how can these people not have a HEART! What if the same was done to them? and plus O do know that many people in the world don't even know what's happening In Palestine , I stay here in Saudi Arabia, everyday the front page of the newspaper is with the news about Gaza and israel and the situation there. When is it gonna STOP? There has been no proper end to it. I remember in 2008-09 if I'm not wrong, major war was going on. There are no words to explain the sufferings of these poor Palestinians!! They wouldn't even know if they would survive the next day or not. Trust me, these people are innocent and have been suffering for more than too long. We all have to join hands and do something about it. I know we really can't do anything but HOPE and PRAY for Palestine.

And, if some of you'll are not familiar with the latest, here is the perfect note on what happened...( I found it online..do read it)

In the predawn hours of May 31, I was aboard the Turkish ship Mavi Marmara, part of a convoy of humanitarian vessels aiming to deliver aid to besieged civilians in Gaza, when we were attacked in international waters by a unit of Israeli commandos.
Our ship had been inspected by customs agents in Turkey, a NATO member, who confirmed that there were no guns or any such weapons aboard. Indeed, the Israeli government has produced no such arms. What was aboard the ship were hundreds of civilian passengers, representatives of dozens of countries, who had planned to deliver the flotilla's much-needed humanitarian materials for the Gazan people. These Palestinians have suffered under an illegal siege - first imposed by Israel in 2005 and strictly enforced since early 2009 - which Amnesty International has called "a flagrant violation of international law."
The passengers on our ship - including elected officials, diplomats, media professionals and human rights workers - joined the flotilla as an act of peaceful protest. Israel's powerful navy could have easily approached our boat and boarded it in broad daylight or pursued nonviolent options for disabling our vessel. Instead, the Israeli military launched a nighttime assault with heavily armed commandos. Under attack, some passengers skirmished with the boarding soldiers using broomsticks and other items at hand. The commandos and navy soldiers shot and killed at least nine civilians and seriously injured dozens more. Others are still missing. The final death toll has yet to be determined.
I feared for the lives of my fellow passengers as I heard shots being fired on deck, and I later saw the bodies of several people killed being carried inside. I had expected soldiers to shoot in the air or aim at people's legs, but instead I saw the bodies of people who appeared to have been shot multiple times in the head or chest.
When it was over, the Israeli soldiers commandeered our ships, illegally kidnapped us from international waters, towed us to the port of Ashdod, and arrested all of us on board.
The Israeli government has confiscated all of our video equipment, hard drives with video footage, cell phones and notebooks. They detained the journalists aboard my ship, preventing them for days from speaking about what happened. Acting on Israel's behalf at the U.N. Security Council, the United States has attempted to block a full, impartial, international investigation of the incident.
Nevertheless, even at this early stage the world has expressed outrage around a basic fact: There is no justification for launching a deadly commando attack in the dark of night on a humanitarian-aid convoy.
The Israeli government denies that its punitive blockade of Gaza is the source of hardship for civilians there. While its spokespeople actively work to create confusion in the media, the truth is clear for all who would care to see it. The overwhelming conclusion of highly respected human rights authorities is that the Israeli government, because it does not accept the legitimacy of the elected Hamas government, is pursuing a policy of what Human Rights Watch calls "collective punishment against the civilian population," illegal under international law.
With regard to the flotilla I was on, the Israeli government says it would have permitted our humanitarian aid to enter Gaza by land had we submitted it through "proper channels." But Israel's "proper channels" - restrictive checkpoints that have repeatedly turned away World Health Organization medical supplies and rejected or delayed the delivery of U.N. food aid - are the very source of the humanitarian crisis.
Israeli spokespeople insist that the Gaza Freedom Flotilla was a provocation. It was, in the sense that civil rights protesters in the American south who sat at segregated lunch counters represented a provocation to segregationists, or in the sense that all nonviolent protests against the illegitimate acts of a government are by definition provocations. Under an illegal siege, the delivery of aid to civilians is a prohibited act; the intent of our humanitarian convoy was to violate this unjust prohibition.
At least nine of my fellow passengers were killed by the Israeli military for attempting to defy the ban on delivering aid. Far more Palestinian civilians have died as a result of the siege itself. What happened to our flotilla is happening to the people of Gaza on a daily basis. It will not stop until international law is applied to all countries, Israel included.

Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2010/06/04/EDC31DQ215.DTL#ixzz0qAbZG3pN

So please, there's nothing more I can say now, please remember GAZA in your prayers and do think about their situation there, its THE WORSE. And they need our support :)

A quick update!

2010-05-25T10:29:00.001-04:00

The reason for my absence is my sisters arrival followed by her engagement preparations and then ya the big day, her engagement :D I still can't believe it, that my sister..is engaged!!! She and him make an amazing couple! God bless them :)

And on the other hand, school's been treating me badly, endless work..and then tests and soon in June we already have our first term exams, which are gonna be really hard cause of the new CBSE system thing in our school. God help me! :S So, how are you all? :P

So, ya it's my first sister's engagement, so you can imagine all the excitement, but on a sad note...my only brother wasn't there, cause he has his university exams so he couldn't fly down out here. Apart from that, everything was amazing!! I'm really happy for my sister :)

Right now, there are too many things on my mind, so I can't even write a very good post, this is just an update, I don't want my blog to die..Just a few more days, when everything around is settled..I'll be back to normal blogging :)

I'm addicted to this song..*When I get older, I will be stronger, they'll call me freedom, just like a waving flag*

Hard times..

2010-05-07T11:06:00.001-04:00

Wise men say life is not easy
I guess they're right, cause nothing seems to be working out
Don't know which road to go
I just keep moving back and fro..

Confusion fills my mind
I don't know to be which kind
Everything seems to be falling apart
Right now, all I need is an understanding heart..

Cant figure out the game destiny plays
Every moment lasts forever
When I feel I've only lost my way
Now, I don't know which role to play..

Ya, they're right
Life is not always alright
But, the heart can go through whatever
Hard times don't last forever..

---Huda Merchant

P.S : I had to write a poem in this competition about life and the hard times. So here it is. I wrote it in half an hour. My first proper poetry :D

I'm Tagged !

2010-04-19T12:11:00.002-04:00

So, this is my first tag by Rishi :) Thank you.
So here are the rules,

RULE 1- You can only say Guilty or Innocent.

RULE 2- You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks!

RULE 3- Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag to your friends to answer this.

The Questions

1. Asked someone to marry you? Innocent

2. Ever kissed someone of the same sex? Innocent

3. Danced on a table in a bar? Innocent

4. Ever told a lie? Guilty

5. Had feelings for someone whom you can’t have back? Guilty

6. Kissed a picture? Guilty

7. Slept in until 5 PM? Guilty

8. Fallen asleep at work/school? Guilty

9. Held a snake? Innocent

10. Been suspended from school? Innocent

11. Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent

12. Stolen from a store? Innocent

13. Been fired from a job? Innocent

14. Done something you regret? Guilty

15. Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Innocent

16. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Innocent

17. Kissed in the rain? Innocent

18. Sat on a roof top? Guilty

19. Kissed someone you shouldn't? Innocent

20. Sang in the shower? Guilty

21. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Innocent

22. Shaved your head? Innocent

23. Had a boxing membership? Innocent

24. Made a boyfriend/Girlfriend cry? Guilty

25. Been in a band? Guilty

26. Shot a gun? Innocent

27. Donated Blood? Innocent

28. Eaten alligator meat? Innocent

29.Eaten cheesecake? Guilty

30. Still love someone you shouldn’t? Guilty

31. Have/had a tattoo? Innocent

32. Liked someone, but will never tell who? Guilty

33. Been too honest? Guilty

34. Ruined a surprise? Innocent

35. Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you couldn’t walk afterward? Innocent

36. Erased someone in your friends list? Guilty

37. Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? Innocent

38. Joined a pageant? Innocent

39.Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Guilty

40. Had communication with your ex? Guilty

41.Got totally drunk on the night before exam? Innocent

42. Got totally angry that you cried so hard? Guilty

And all my followers are tagged. Cause I wanna everyones :)

Make A Wave..

2010-04-13T10:20:00.004-04:00

They say the beat of a butterflies' wings ,can set off a storm a world away,what if they're right, and the smallest of things can power the strongest hurricane ..what if it all begins inside..
we hold the key that turns the tide..
just a pebble in the water
can set the sea in motion
a simple act of kindness
can stir the widest ocean

if we show a little love
heaven knows what we could change
oh yeah
so throw a pebble in the water and make a wave

The single choice to take a stand
and reach out your hand to someone in need
(help somebody)
don't fool yourself and say you can't
you never know what can grow
from just one seed
yeahhh
so come with me and seize the day
this world may never be the same
just a pebble in the water , can set the sea in motion
a simple act of kindness
can stir the widest ocean
if we show a little love
heaven knows what we could change
oh yeah
so throw a pebble in the water and make a wave, make a wave
Make a wave, make a wave

This is this song I really like by Demi Lovato and Joe Jonas, I first saw it on american idol, 3 weeks back. I love the lyrics. You'll should really listen to this song :)

Where is peace? No where. Like really, one problem ends and the other has just begin. In places like Iraq, Palestine..fights never stop. Even in India itself, endless rape cases and stupid fights over BOOTLESS things. People fight with each other in their own country and then we say that we all are united!

It's high time, this all needs to stop. Sufferings around the world are BOUNDLESS. Doesn't everyone have the right to stay happily? then why fight all the time amongst states, countries, people, this and and that. There's no reason to fight about, yet they do. Controversies are NEVER ENDING! Please just stop. Show some love, live happily, let people live, stop hatred against people, states and countries!

I was going on telling my friend about my crush, He is not Indian. He is from Pakistan. So what? Anyways, so..so she goes like "He's pakistani!" Okay, well many reacted like that..but seriously so what? I stay here in Jeddah and I'm friends with Pakistanis and all other country people like South Africans, Russians, Arabs, etc. Its all cool. I know that Indians have issues with Pakistanis, but I say that its all gagged up. Pakistan was a part of India long back right? And, we all should really stop discriminating and creating differences. If we don't stop, how do you expect for the bigger change to happen, for India to have a better relationship with Pakistan than now!

A Change starts from an individual, And in my opinion..Pakistan is not a bad country, its equally good as any other country and it has a lot of similarities with India obviously. And like people often think that it's a country which belongs to a number of extremists and stuff, but they are wrong, its a very modern country and if you learn more about it, you shall know.

Since, I have a couple of friends from there, I have learnt a lot about Pakistan. And it's high time that we should really stop these contradistinguishes between India and Pakistan..

Ding Dong

2010-03-31T11:14:00.002-04:00

Hello, I am back to Jeddah,Saudi Arabia. My trip to Pune was as usual, amazing. Or well, beyond amazing :) Pune is always amazing.But, now I have to be back to school and now I'm gonna be in grade 10! My last year in school, I'm so excited. I'm not very sure if it's my last year in 'school' but it is my last year in this particular school I go to,which I hate. I was planning on going to junior college in Pune itself, but on second thoughts my parents are even thinking of admitting me in an IGSCE school out here only, to do my A levels and O levels, as some say its better off for the future. I don't know which would be better for me. Any ideas please? Well, there's still an entire year left but still, planning is good. I want to go to junior college in Pune cause, I have a few of my wonderful friends out there and I love Pune. And I would like to go to an IGSCE school cause I don't know, I have always wanted to go there especially the one which I'm planning to go in. And cause, for the future, I am even planning to either go to UK or USA for further studies to do my fashion designing, so if I do my A levels and O levels, it might be very helpful too. *sigh* I really don't know what to do right now. So if any suggestions, please feel free to comment :)

Anyways, I was just thinking about this that,
Sometimes, when certain things happen..even if it's the most petty thing, my mind starts thinking of going to a new place, with new people, and just taking a few close people along with me. I know that we can't just run away from things, we gotta face them.But still, sometimes..I really wish I could go to a new place with new people and have a new life. It's not that I'm very bored of my life, It's just that I need some excitement..some more fun and new experiences. In short, I wanna do something new. I'm bored of the same old routine. Schools gonna start, everything is gonna be the usual old same, go to school, come back, sleep, study, timepass. Thats it. I wanna do something new, not just in vacations..I wanna do something even during school days.

What happened to the friends forever part?

2010-03-20T17:09:00.001-04:00

You know you meet certain people and then become friends and then we keep saying FRIENDS FOREVER. Bullshit. Things don't last. People change with time. A lot.

I was so depressed with a few friends who I though would be together forever..I was so wrong. I realize that we aint kids anymore, everyone doesn't get along with everyone.With time, so much has changed! Everyone's got a problem with everyone. Bitches just wont stop bitching about EVERYTHING without even looking at themselves first.

I mean seriously, why do people have to bitch so much about others when they aint that great themselves, have they looked at themselves in the mirror?? They bitch about others dressing sense when its actually not that bad. Okay, they say "oh shes so dressy!" Dude, its a party! Wouldn't she dress according to the occasion unlike you, whose just wearing a simple tee and jeans. And did we bitch about how simple you are dressed? No right, then why do you have to? Everyone is different, let one dress the way he or she wants. Everyone's not very fond of fashion. So, just stop bitching please! It's really very annoying!!

And secondly how people change is bad. How groups just separate due to reasons like silly break ups and senseless bitching and everyone having a problem with everyone, ego clashes, etc. It hurt me, cause I believed that we would be together for long..but I guess 'long' ends right here. Apart from fights and arguments, this is different, It has just ended.

But, I guess we really can't do anything about it. This is how life is. There's lot more ahead and we do have the one or two best friends forever. Life goes on. Friends come and friends go, some stay close, some drift apart. Accept it. This is how it is. :)

In Pune..

2010-03-05T15:43:00.001-05:00

Well,long time. I have been a little bit busy...landed in mumbai on sunday morning, then stayed there for like four days ..shopped,shopped and shopped :) And then now am here, In Pune..back home. Gonna be here until the end of march. Hoping to have a good time. I finally watched princess and the frog today evening, it was really cute!! And the funny part was after half an hour, we came across a frog or I guess it was a toad. Haha, we got so scared. Not that the frog would really ask for a kiss ;)

You know, things change. Good or bad but they all change with time. I returned here, in Pune after about 5 months and things have changed quite a bit. People too. Some in the good ways and some in bad ways..whether we like it or not we have to deal with change. Cause I too agree that i have also changed quite a bit in these few months but I think its for the good. I think I have become more bold than before and now I can take emotional stuff properly.I don't cry for every little thing, cause things happen for a reason and we all gotta believe in that. I have experienced that recently that whatever has happened to me in the past few months or past one year, it's all happened for the good.

I agree that,more than a year back, I was really very upset when I relocated to Jeddah, Saudia Arabia from Pune. I was really upset cause I had to leave everything behind, my school, my friends and my sister too since she is studying out here. But, I knew I was going back there for something, I was going there to be back with my father. I was staying away from my dad for 6 years, only met when I went there for vacation and when he came here and I missed him a lot. And we actually left from there because they don't have many colleges there even if they have, its mostly for the saudis..well, I don't really know much about it so I shouldn't say anything. And my sister had to come to India for college and then thats how we all came here and my dad stayed there since he couldn't leave the job at that stage. And then, we started adjusting to this place and when I was totally adjusted we decided to go back cause of reasons. So then, my sister stayed here and she will until she finishes her course and then she will be back with us, in Jeddah. And my brother now stays in London for studying purposes.

So yea, my family is in 3 places..Pune, Jeddah and London but we do meet each other during holidays and then have a really great time together :)

Back to my story, It took me hell lot of time to adjust in Jeddah especially the school, cause I don't find it as good as my previous school. Few months out there were really bad..I cried almost everyday and wanted to run back to Pune...and then as months went by..school got a little better..and my parents did a lot so that I would like it out there. And then finally, I made a few friends in my compound and things just got better. And I like it there now. And I know the things which have happened to me there are for a reason. And shopping is great out there :P And whenever I come here to Pune for vacation, I enjoy here as well :)

P.S::This is the first time I have actually shared personal stuff..I don't know, I just felt like.

And, no matter what happens in your life, remember it has a reason to it and you may not realize it now ...but later you will. :)

They come under the category, 'cute'..

2010-02-25T12:34:00.000-05:00

Okay, At the moment, I'm barely getting anytime to blog cause I have been having my final exams..which will now end day after tomorrow. And then I'm no more a 9th grader. Holidays begin and I'm gonna fly to Mumbai, India alone :) And then in 2 days go to the place I love, Pune :D I'm gonna be there with my elder sister and loads of friends, so it's gonna be fun :) And I'm gonna blog from there too to keep everyone updated ;)

Anyways, so I was watching this movie again with my friends, 'Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging' And the guy in it, Robbie played by Aaron Johnson is adorable. We all were sort of jealous of the girl who gets to be with him despite being an ugly girl. Okay, I know we shouldn't judge anyone on the basis of looks. After all it's all about what kind of person you are.

So, yea anyways my post is actually about the few guys who I think are cute :P

Chad Murray:: I fell in love with him when I watched A Cinderella story. I love his character in he movie and he looks adorable :) Don't you think so?

Aaron Johnson:: Yea, He's the one I was talking about. He has a perfect british accent which I adore. I love him as Robbie..But, I was totally shocked when I found out that he is engaged to this 42 year old lady and he is already expecting a child with her!! Unbelievable, he could get a thousand other girls who would fall for him and then this lady falls in love with him and so does he and he's only 19!! *confused face*

Josh Hartnett :: Okay, he is cute. Especially in the movie, 'Wicker Park'. Hot.

Chace Crawford : Hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. Love him.

Who doesn't love Edward Cullen? Okay, I even love Robert Pattinson..love his british accent and he's got a good sense of humour too :) But, he should really fix his hair and take a shower.

David Archuleta:: He has the most cutest smile ever! And guess what, I even know someone who looks similar to him!! I totally love love love him! This crush aint going away.. :P

Love his song, live like we're dying and He's super smart!

Okay, my list doesn't really end here..but these were few of the many.. What about your favourites ?

Thoughts in my bubble..

2010-02-09T12:09:00.000-05:00

Hey...its been awhile since I wrote my last post. Reason: My finals are coming up, and I have been going outside alot.

God! Have you met these really desperate girls or guys. I'm sure many of us have.Why are they so damn desperate? There's so much more to life! You have family, friends, etc.. why are you adding up more drama to your life and that too they date people they dont even know. Internet dating. Seriously? How can you trust someone on the internet so much, that you 'fall in love' with him/her. Some day, your right person will come, don't sell yourself for a wrong guy online!

Slutty girls..I have come across a few.. And I really dislike them. I don't think all guys like them either. I know a lot of guys who don't like slutty girls. Even if they are pretty, they ruin their beauty by the way the act and behave.

I think a girl should dress decently or even if you're wearing mini skirts or what so ever, showing skin,etc... you should be able to carry it off well, or else it would end up looking cheap and slutty.

I don't know, I'm going through this phase where I really dislike relationships at an early age, especially when its complicated. And I so hate it when people break up for the most lamest reasons ever! And many times, especially between your friends..if two of them are dating and they break up,and you're the really close one between them..and they don't even wanna be friends anymore, it's frustrating. Because at one side, I don't want them to ruin their friendship and at the other, I don't wanna ruin mine either, cause I know I have to choose one of them. What if both both of them are like my best mates ever, it will make a lot of difference. I just want things to get better.
My friends mean a lot to me, after family. And few of them are just really special. I would do anything for them and for their happiness. And seriously when you have good friends and family,it's like you have all the love in the world. They would really tell you everything about you frankly, without letting you hurt.I love my friends and family no matter what. And I'm really far away from most of them, but yet I think the distance lets us be close cause true friends don't need to be close all the time, our hearts are always together, close, near and dear.

And, about relationships and stuff, there's a lot more to life too and even if you love somebody, make sure it lasts long. Even though frequent fights and petty arguments, you can make it through. And have a lot of patience..don't go too fast and have the patience to listen and forgive. Think about how it feels in the other person's shoes and then take decisions related to them. Don't be too harsh or mean either.

P.S: This was just random talk. Just the thoughts in my bubble today.

The influence of twilight in teenagers..

2010-01-27T15:33:00.002-05:00

Warning:: Twilight may cause loss of sleep and obsession with vampires.

Forget about Harry Potter, now it's all about impossibly handsome vampire, Edward Cullen..star of the twilight saga.He's a much darker character than Harry, but they have a few things in common..They both have spawned best-selling novels,smash-hit movies and have had their influences on teenagers.

If we go to see, twilight could be both a good or bad influence. As I am a fan of twilight, I would like to start off with the positive affects.
I consider that it has promoted reading in many teens, especially girls. People who never prefered reading fictional books, have had the book hooked. Twilight involves fantasy, and fantasy means entertainment which also provides an escape for its readers from the stressed out lives they lead.
  Many of the people feel that the book has only influenced girls to the admirable vampire, Edward. But, In my opinion we have also been incited by the other characters of the series..like Alice,cause of her friendly-like nature.. Carlisle,cause of his compassion motivated self-control,patient and non-judgemental nature,etc.
Another thing about the book is that the characters are flawed, hence their flaws make them more believable and chronicle.

Twilight alone has not only influenced teens but schools too. In Bolivar high school, Missouri..it has been introduced as a lore subject. The teachers of the school say that, they often even communicate in twilight quotes!!

Now,to actuate the repercussions..
According to me, there are barely any negative points because..Firstly, Twilight is a fictive novel. If one knows how to distance themselves from it and not socially follow its norms,then there is no harm.Twilight is just entertainment.
   And what teens should know is that these books are just for fun and which also builds up their vocabulary,refines their imagination and dilates creativity.

All in all, twilight is a well written suspenseful,fictive and fanciful book. Bella's first person narration is very authentic and the dialougue is often witty.The characters are very convincing and much inciting too.
  I would like to conclude by saying that, twilight could be both a positive or negative influence depending on how you delineate it!!

P.S: This is what I spoke for my english assignment and I got an A+ :)

Now, there were 2 other girls..who spoke about the same topic. But the negative. They say that twilight sends a wrong message to teenagers about love and relationships. But, I think that twilight shows that love is the most vulnerable light and is more of a commitment than the physical part. And as I said it is a fictional novel and is a great work of fantasy..you are smart enough to see whats right and whats wrong for you.
Next, she said that it has grammatical errors and it seems it has been said by an english teacher. First of all, if it really had grammatical errors, would it be new york's best-selling novel? Would it be introduced as a lore subject in a school?
Thirdly, she said that Bella only changes herself for Edward to like her..so that aint good since a girl shoul'nt change herself for a guy to like her. But, all the people who have read the book know that Bella does'nt change herself for Edward to like her but just so that she could live forever with him.And in a way, to protect her family. And Edward only changes her when she was on her death bed!! So I don't think that point is correct.
And, in the end I would like to say is that everything has its own plus and minus and so does twilight. It is your choice to choose from the right and wrong.

I need a little bit help...

2010-01-16T13:07:00.000-05:00

Here's the thing, I have to write an essay type thing for my english seminar which is due next week.I need a little bit help with it.Since all of you'll are wonderful writers and thinkers, I would appreciate it if you could help me out a little bit.

So, The topic is ' Twilight influence on teenagers'

Please give me your opinion and ideas on it.

Thank you.

It's you and me.. (2)

2010-01-14T04:48:00.005-05:00

Continuation to It's you and me (1).

"You're so shy..."
"No, I'm not.." *blushes*
"That's so cute"
"What?"
*smiles* "The red cheeks .."
"Ooh" *smiles*
Damn, Why can't I control..! But he finds it cute ..so its okay :P

Slowly holds her hand..
She holds them tightly and there's silence.She slightly puts her head on his shoulder and then, with his other hand he puts his arm around her.

"Do you want chocolate?"
"Yea, obviously..you think I'll say no for chocolate!"
"Haha yeah" Puts one piece of the chocolate in his mouth.

They talk about each other, likes, dislikes, etc.

*After an hour*

Her cell rings...

"Hello"
"Okay okay, I'm coming.."
"10minutes, and I'll be there"
"Hehe Yeah okay"
"Bye"

"Who was it?"
"My friends..they're like it's late so I should go back to Tia's, they all are over"
"Oh, so girl's night over also?"
"Yeah...I wanted to spend more time with you though."
"It's okay sweetie"
*smiles* "Okay then, walk me to my building and then you go okay? I'm scared you know"
*chuckles* "Yea, nice way of getting some extra time with me... lets go then."

They walk and talk holding hands..

"So..then I'll see you...tomorrow??"
"Yea, probably"
Slowly,leave hands..and then she hugs him.."Thank you.. definitely one of my best night"
"Don't worry, there's way more to come.."

In a moment, gives her a little kiss on her cheek, She blushes and then gives him one back..and then shyly walks away into her building. He leaves too.

In a little time..

*tweet tweet, sms*
1 message received from him
'you're so damn shy and cute, hehe'

She smiles..
'hehe I know, and you're so adorable ;)

'I love you sweetie'

'I love you too"

She reaches her friend's house....

"SHE'S HERE!!! SO, TELL US , TELL US, HOW WAS IT ? WHAT HAPPENED? ............."

It's you and me..(1)

2010-01-09T14:55:00.001-05:00

There she came down in her plain yet exquisite, just below the knee black dress and there he was waiting for her. This was their first.
"So... what took you so long?"
"I'm a girl, I take time to get ready" *smiles*
"Ooh, Yeah yeah true!! *chuckles*
"So....?"
"Ummm, you look gorgeous!!"
" Thank you very much!! You look really cute and handsome too!"
"Yeah, thanks. So, should we go to the garden or where?"
"Yeah, garden is a good idea.."
They walk and just talk a little of the usual stuff...In about 10 minutes they reached the garden. The garden was quite empty since it was 9 pm and most of the people had returned home by that time.They choose a spot and go and sit there.

"So..."
"By the way, I got something to eat..like snacks" opens her bag, and removes a pack of lays, dairy milk, a medium bottle of 7 up and two glasses.
"Oh, that's cool! and by the way, I got this little candle too..so that I could hide it properly from you." removes a candle and a matchbox.
"Ooh, That's so sweet !"
He put the candle in the between and when he's just about to light it..
"Hey, let me do it please!"
"oh okay, sure."
She tries to light it..but she always gets petrified and throws the matchstick.This happened for about 3 times.
"I can do it, give it to me."
"No, I can!"
"Yea yea sure"
"Hey! don't think I cant light a candle haan, I can "
He chuckles looking at her..stares at her while she was still trying.
"C'mmon now give it, you can't do it."
"Ugh , okay whatever. You think you're too smart na!!"
"Hmmm, yes i am" *laughs*
He lights the candle in a second.She comes closer to the candle light, and he looks at her admiringly.
While talking and talking about random stuff, like school,friends,movies,songs, etc..they open up the lays packet and then the drink..and then
"I got my I-pod and speakers too!"
" Awesome..switch it on!"
"Yea..just second."
He switches on the I-pod and plays 'Fantasy'
"Now, stand up !
"okay...why?"
"You always wanted to dance right? so come and dance with me."
She stands up, he gives her his hand..and then right in front of the little lighted candle..they slowly start..
His hands are on her waist and her arms around him.
"Thank you man!"
"Uhh..yea."
"You know I always wanted this candle night, A dance like this and you know....It's one of my favourite songs too"
"Yeah, I do..that's why all this na"
She looks downwards and smiles shyly....

she looks so adorable when she smiles..damn, okay..chill dude chill..this is going on really well..

Let me be your Fantasy
I know you dream of me
Every time you fall asleep
Fantasy
And when you think of me
Just close your eyes and dream

The music stops in about 3 minutes and then they look into each others eyes..for the first time..
She gets goosebumps and he smiles lightly..
Then, she looks down and then they sit down where they were.

*Smiling...smiling..smiling..*

Little pleasures

2009-12-25T14:10:00.002-05:00

There are somethings in life which have its own pleasures. Little to little things make you happy, they warm your heart and add a smile to your face.

Yesterday while looking at the waves and the sound they make...I was just thinking of all the different things that make me happy...or give me pleasure like just walking on cold sand, getting wet in the rains! Even the little to little everyday life things...Just think about it.

Little pleasures of my life:
1. Walking on cold sand at the beach on a pleasant evening
2.Listening to my favourite songs on high volume.
3.Having water when I'm really very thirsty
4.Falling asleep when I'm dead tired.
5.Walking all alone at night with my best friend.
6.Midnight swims!!
7.Talking to someone I love for a very long long time.
8.Having ice-cream when its very sunny!!
9.Looking at Robert Pattinson :P
10.Jumping in puddles and getting wet in the rains!!
11.Screaming and jumping when something really good has happened.
12.The feeling when I came to India after 7 months and it just rained...the smell of the after rains!!! love it!
13.When someone you love says 'I love you' after a long time.
14.Looking at old pictures and smiling.
15.Looking at the mirror when I'm looking really cute :P ( yes, I'm sort of self obsessed)
16.Cuddling into the blanket when its a chilly night.
17.Meeting loved ones (sister, brother, best friends,etc) after a very long time.
18.HUGS from few selected people :-)
19.Walking on a windy evening and your hair flying by.
20.Dreaming...day dreaming!
21.The feeling when you have just bought the best of clothes and other stuff.
22.Laughing your head off and then your stomach hurts!! :D
23.Holding hands.
24.Doing crazy and retard things

And so many more!! some little to little things make one smile :-) what are the little things in everyday life which make you smile or make you feel good ? :-)

No matter what..

2009-12-18T07:39:00.000-05:00

Finally..

Guess what? my family is together again for a short break. My sister and brother arrived yesterday..I'm so super hyper and damn happy!!

I was just wondering what I would do without them??? I have no clue at all!! They make me laugh when I'm down and they understand me and love me for ME! and I can do whatever,be with them.

There might be issues with a family or anything, but yet you can't really stay away from them for too long. We all might say that we would like to stay alone, without them ...but once you experience that you would know that you cant stay without them forever.

I might be getting really annoyed at my younger sister or mother or anyone...but at the end of it all , I love them and I cant be apart from them for too long.I would miss my dad's cricket fantasy, my mom getting annoyed at me, my sisters hugs, my brothers arguments and my little sister's messiness.No matter what I will always love them and be there for them.

Family is important.You may not realize it now, but at some point of life,you will.

There are so many broken families around the globe.I feel bad for them, really.

I may not always understand my parents and what they do for me, but I will always love them.And I would always try to understand what they do.

Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul.

So please, love your family, be there for them when they need you, have fun and enjoy!!

P.S :: Do you think I should change my blog template/background? I'm confused...please tell me via comment.Thank you. :-)

Right or Wrong ??

2009-12-10T10:39:00.001-05:00

How would you know that the decision you are taking is right or wrong? How would you know whether what you're doing is correct or incorrect? I am not talking about tests or anything like that but about decisions in life and stages we go through.

Its so confusing at times when you really wanna do something but still are not sure whether if its right or wrong...will it cause trouble or what? is it really what you want ??

And sometimes you do know its wrong but really really wanna do it...then? Then what do you do? Will it be worth the risk??

Sometimes I really get stuck in situations where I know its wrong but i HAVE to do it or WANT to...its really confusing!!

They define 'style' !!

2009-11-10T09:37:00.002-05:00

Taylor Momsen, from gossip girl, I totally love her character especially in the first season, and I think she's got great style, truly! she looks amazing and carries herself very well.

Vanessa Hudgens:: I don't really like her in person, but I really like her style alot. She looks great in casuals and I love her big bags and boots. More than on the red carpet and movies, I prefer her in her casuals.I prefer her in her jeans.What do you think?

These were my two new style icons, apart from them, as mentioned earlier:: Demi Lovato,Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, etc..inspire me alot. Who are your style icons???

You're gonna be a shinin' star In fancy clothes and fancy cars And then you'll see you're gonna go far 'Cause everyone knows just who you are...

2009-11-02T10:05:00.002-05:00

Hey, sorry for not blogging for awhile its cause of homework, projects, mood swings, changes in feelings every second day, etc.

Anyways, I was just wondering about how ungrateful we are to so many things we are given...we always crib and complain about what we don't have rather than being thankful with what we DO HAVE. I mean seriously, there are so many things in my life I have been very ungrateful to, but just look at yourself, look at your life, how is it? We all can be happy even with the most littlest things in life, thats happiness ---enjoying every bit of your life.

Sadly,all of us cannot achieve happiness all the time...obviously! but yea that does'nt mean you have to be sad all the time. Time comes and goes, good moments pass by and so do bad moments.

You know what, I was so ungrateful to my life, but as time passes by I realize how genial and happy it is.Now, also when sad times come, I get frustrated with my life, but actually....even through the dark clouded days , you learn a lot! its like every moment of your life....you are learning something or the other.

And, about haters....we get so angry at them and hence start hating them too cause of them hating us! well, you can't do anything about these people, you can't hate someone for NOT liking you, it aint compulsary for all the people of the world to love you. You see your favourite celebrities, they have many fan clubs but yes they even have hate clubs!! And plus even we do hate alot of people in our lives, don't we?

So, never mind what haters say, ignore them till they fade away...just live your life!!

People

2009-10-12T09:02:00.000-04:00

Have you ever imagined how much hardwork the 'great' people do just to get that fame and money?! The other day, I was watching this show called 'tere mere beech mei' for all those who are clueless about it, its a show hosted by Farah Khan, where she interviews the celebrities in bollywood.This show is pretty different than the other bollywood talk shows, its not just the normal chat show where people just talk and talk about their next movies and blah blah. They talk about the several issues and problems they have gone through in their life.Believe me, I was so deeply inspired when I watched the episode when Hrithik Roshan was interviewed, no one could have ever imagined how MUCH hard work he has done just to reach to the stage where he is now.It seems,he use to stammer till the age of 21, now he does'nt but thats cause he made lot of effort and made the impossible HAPPEN! Like they say, practice makes man perfect, yes, very true! it does! He wanted to become an actor since a very young age, people use to laugh at him cause he could'nt say 'I wanna be an actor' properly because of his stammering!! Then, he thought about it, what he really wanted was to become an actor..yes, and there he is...fullfilled all his dreams!! He actually started from the scratch! he use to spend the whole day practicing each letter so that he could talk properly! and till date he still practices one hour a day!! And then he even had this back problem, he would'nt be able to dance...but dude, have you even seen his dancing!!! Yes, hard work, determination and faith makes things possible...There is no such word as impossible, cause there are people who have proved it that impossible things can happen!

I remember in my previous school, our principal and CEO kept telling us everytime to strike off the word 'impossible' from the dictionary cause there is no word like impossible.All things can happen, if you put your full effort and hard work to it.Be dedicated in what ever you do and excel in it! No matter what you do, even if its a little thing...putting your whole dedication makes it the best. :-)

Miracles happen!! :-) 'nothing is impossible,cause the word itself says I'm possible!' :D

My name and blog in Today's Mid-day!!!!!!!!

2009-09-30T09:01:00.005-04:00

Hey, there's some really great news, my friend's mom works in mid day (pune) and she was given to write an article on teenage bloggers and stuff, so my name and my other mate's name ::Adnan Shaikh was given with the description of our blog :-) my link turned out to be printed wrong and unfortunately my picture given was my other friends picture with Adnan. So, that was a mistake, it will get corrected. I'm really happy about this!! :D

The Article

Kuch toh b-log kahenge

Teens turn to blogging to talk about themselves, make friends and ponder over life, reports Shree Lahiri

passionate: Huda Merchant, Adnan Shaikh and Fahad Naqvi feel blogs help them discuss issues and connect with others

Adnan Shaikh (14) from NIBM
Shaikh started this blog with friend Fahad Naqvi (14) from Magarpatta City, in April. Shaikh says in a post, "Well I Just A Lill' teen dude (for now) trying to get through his time of his life like any not so un extraordinary teen in this not so un extraordinary World!" The blog offers a mixed bag of gossip and social activities. Shaikh has uploaded many candid shots of outings with friends. "There's a corner for crushes too, and allows comments," said Shaikh.
shakenchada.blogspot.com

Huda Merchant (14)
Huda enjoys writing about fashion, friends and family. Huda, who recently relocated to Jeddah, KSA, from Pune, with her family, continues to be in touch with her friends in Pune through her blog. The contents of Huda's blog reflect a journal touch, as her post topics include Glints in the life of a not-so-average teenager, On Independence day, Talking about religion, Being a girl.
Age no bar
Huda feels age is not a barrier for blogging, as she recently helped her nine-year-old sister Hanifa create her own blog. "It is childish, but it's quite rare," she said. Hanifa in her blog — littlehanu7.blogspot.com — talks about her best friend, her sister and herself.
Teachers say
Shaila Surkund from Rewachand Bhojwani Academy at Camp said, "Most of them spend a lot of time on their computers and rarely take part in physical activities. But it is alright, as they talk about different things and know more than us."
Another teacher said, "It's a release mechanism, as they discuss about things that affects them."
missrandom. blogspot.com

Peer pressure

Dr Sunita Raman, a psychiatrist at Wanwadi, said, "The Internet is used as a friend. It's so impersonal and the question of inhibitions does not arise. There is no censure, but only unconditional acceptance." In their efforts make friends, kids may become easy targets. "Parental or adult guidance should be given to them," she added.

Do you know?

* Over 1,20,000 blogs are created every day
* There are over 1.4 million new blog posts every day
* 22 of the 100 most popular websites in the world are blogs.
* Blog readers average 23 hours online each week.

Back to normal life..

2009-09-26T08:39:00.002-04:00

2months passed by and now its back to Jeddah and back to routine.Back to school, But after 2 weeks, thanks to the pigs!! Back to life now, but now in a different way..during this vacation its like I found myself or something they say? ummmm I really dont know, but I have changed a little bit, in a good way. Thanks to all my friends, with whoom I can be myself and do what I want not worrying about what people think.

Anyways, this time I decided to be myself cause thats more important than what people think.I don't want to do things just cause people are doing it and stuff. I'm gonna be who i am, and do what I want to do.I won't let anyone ruin my day.Its all up to me, how I deal and what I do with my life.

This vacation was amazing filled with memorable moments.Yes swine flu did stop us from doing certain things, but its okay.This summer in the monsoon had it all...friendship,happiness,family,fun,saddness(very little though), adventure..we went up the hill twice!! fun fun!!, comedy and loads more and most importantly LOVE :-)

Every day was a new day, no fights, no complains, just happiness..they say happiness comes from enjoying the small daily things of life.Yes, its very true...cause we didn't do anything extra ordinary or something special, It's just that when you're with the people you love, all the moments spent together become special.Yes, even the boring ones, believe me..!!

After this summer,things have changed and for the good! I know the value of my friends and family and myself too ;)

Sometimes, its just better to accept life the way it is, cause its all for the good and up there, someone's planning a big picture for the coming future. :-)

Though I am gonna miss the late night conversations, messages, dancing in the rain ,meeting after school,etc..but hey, its all gonna be back soon, who knows, next time its gonna be better!! yes it will be better :D

always there by my side, my 2 bestest friends...

She forced me

2009-09-13T08:00:00.001-04:00

She forced me to make her a blog, I said no and told her that she was too young, finally, after 2 months, lots of pleading, I agreed and now my little sister owns her own blog!! shes EIGHT!!

Here is little hanu's blog!!

14...FINALLY!!

2009-09-08T11:37:00.000-04:00

Hey, ok so I'm not that excited but yes a little!! ok a lot! just for some unknown reasons, obviously, everyone gets happy on their birthdays.

I am happy cause in another two years I can ride a bike.Yay!

I'm happy cause, the past one year of my teenage life has gone well, with all sorts of moments and experiences and I look forward for more adventures!!

I'm happy cause I'm celebrating my birthday with my friends and family in Pune, unlike last time, when I was travelling and shifting from Pune :-(

I'm celebrating my birthday tomorrow with my family and then with my friends :-)

Now, I'm just waiting for midnight :-)

Random Talk :: Teenage love

2009-09-02T11:22:00.010-04:00

They call it puppy love

or they say it's just an infatuation, and we'll get over it.

some people wanna fall in love , not cause they love the person, but for some other unknown reason.

some of them really and truly love the person.

We all have had crushes right? mostly at the age of 12 to 19 I guess. I had my first crush in the 7Th grade...it was really one big infatuation!! I was so damn obsessed with that guy, and I had never spoken to him or anything...I liked him cause he was adorable, really very cute.Most of us at that age did fall for looks and all, .and like every story, yes he hated me BUT just cause I liked him! Everyone knew!! The entire 7Th grade...EMBARRASSING!!My crush went on for 6-7months..then he left school soon and I later got over it.

Anyways, so why do people call teenage love 'puppy love'? I don't know yet!? Do you?? Cause according to me, even if you fall in love now, and even if you're not sure about how long it will go on, taking a risk is worth it sometimes, as far as what I have seen.some relationships might last and some might not, it's how YOU deal with it..

I know that, some people just get into a relationship for wrong stuff, some of them just want to be WANTED and LOVED, so they go around dating online and stuff, which is LAME and STUPID!

Some of them, don't want to fall in love, but it HAPPENS,no matter how much you ignore it,you DO fall in love at sometime.

They say, true love comes only once a lifetime.Well, I don't know about that.

I have seen that some relationships DO last really very long, sometimes you would actually think that they would last a lifetime,they might you know!! It's basically how YOU and you're partner deal with it.

In the old generations, they mostly had arranged marriages, that's why people say, they don't know about 'teenage love' or stuff but so what? they know about love,just imagine that you have to marry this unknown person, you kinda know him but not much, ain't it so weird that these couples who in the start hardly knew each other, have a really happy married life, It's how you deal with it, they got along really well,adjusted and now they are like some of the PERFECT couples.

Anyways, towards the end of this post, why do people call it puppy love,infatuation or just an attraction??

Why do people wanna get into relationships just to be WANTED or some other reason , but not cause they really love the person??

Why do some people ignore the 'feeling' ?? why? age? or what??

P.S: should I change my blog template,background,anything about my blog?

This moment..

2009-08-21T10:59:00.008-04:00

I have dreamed alot of things, now I wanna make them come true, dreams are a way to escape from reality , do what you want, do the things you wished to do!

I wanna be 16 and ride a scooty which is probably purple in colour..then go anywhere I want...not just by rickshaw or ask someone to drop me.I wanna stay in India.I wanna get out of my present school and go to college or my previous school.

I wanna be independent, I wanna do some crazy stuff, I wanna dance like there's no tomorrow..though I know there is a TOMORROW, I wanna live each moment and have a bright future.I want people to like me for who I am really not for who I'm not.

I don't want to get married before 24,I wanna have a huge wardrobe,I wanna learn new things I like,I wanna try new and different things,I wanna have fun,I wanna have my priorities set right and do the right things at the right time though we can't be right all the time but the time I do bad, I wanna realize that what I did was wrong!

I want my real friends to stick with me through all my life no matter what distance or what so ever.I don't really care about the friends who are just using me for some reason or the people who don't care.I don't care about bitches and people who don't like me.

I wanna make a difference,I wanna do something more important with my life.Though to make everyone happy is a tough call I still wanna try and make people happy:-)

Sometimes loneliness and sadness helps and is needed in life though its depressing there's always a positive outcome!

I have the most weirdest and best people making appearances in my life, there are even the bad people who make their appearances but all for some kind of outcome which is realized after a long time.

I love my life, though I really hate it sometimes and there are loads of twists and bumps but its all ok cause I can always make it better! I'm writing my story..so its all up to me!

I don't like boredom but sometimes it makes me do amazing things like this blog, which had actually started through my boredom activities and now blogging is one of my favourite hobby!!

I love my country!!!

2009-08-15T04:21:00.008-04:00

Happy independence day!! Though for me it doesn't really seem so cause of no school programme and swine flu being all around the city! I remember last year was like one of my best days! we had a prabhat peheri ( parade) at 6am. in a township called magarpata...we all were really sleepy and complained that why does the school have to call us 1 hour early for some parade! But it turned out to be amazing!! It was a huge place..dances and songs were going on and all of us were just walking and talking.walk and talk:P

We went back to school soon..we had a small break for 15 minutes .Since I was in the school band,We were called earlier for practice..throughout whenever we were supposed to be playing, we played it really well!!:-) We had a small programme for the house keepers and cleaners..they were given certificates and stuff for their hard work.They really appreciated it and that's the best part! We were given lectures by our principal and CEO which were long but pretty good.

In the end we were given refreshments and then back home and I had guests from Dubai..I was very very tired couldn't talk about my parade alot with my family, it was only after I had a good nap I could chatter.

The day was amazing!! Filled with surprising moments.

This year?? I don't feel it at all! I wore white and blue kurti and jeans..I put the Indian flag badge....still not feeling it?! I couldn't even go for parade cause there ain't any cause of the swine flu!!

Every year we had Indian dances, songs,painted faces,wearing tri colour accesories,etc..now I miss it cause I didnt celebrate republic day either staying in Jeddah and now when I was here for 15th august,SWINE FLU had to come in! I miss a lot of things about India when I'm away and no matter what I love my country India..its UNIQUE and there's no place like it.

What is this life?!!

2009-08-12T13:12:00.003-04:00

"whats the purpose of life cause in the end anyway we loose everything?"

"You're only 13, when did you start worrying so much about life and stuff?"

"I just wanna know, tell na!!"

" so..OK don't do what you like,don't earn any money,do not go to school , don't shop..etc..whats the use right??"

"NO I don't mean it that way..I mean why do we work so hard and stuff and than finally whenever you die, you're gonna loose everything..so whats the use??"

"Its nothing about 'whats the use' its like see,why do you dance and have fun with your friends...what's the use?? nothing! but it makes you happy and you have fun..similarly..life is like a party,even though it might not be the party you imagined..you have to dance your heart off!!"

"I still don't get you? I mean dance your heart off and what crap man? I wanna know the meaning of this life!! I don't get it!"

"no one really does..just live your life happily!"

"wow that does make alot of sense eh? Its very easy to say..'live your life!'but like how and what..I don't think you get what I mean!?"

"See..its important to live your life to the fullest no matter what! Do what you want and like but remember to draw the lines where needed..be nice to people and make loads of friends and don't get into dangerous stuff and keep distance from bad stuff"

"huh ok..I do get that but what I want to know is whats the purpose??"

"no one really knows whats the PURPOSE, you have to figure it out..and now you are really young!! you have loads of time ahead!!"

"well, I am trying to figure it out..but its complicated..hard and really weird!"

"listen, you have a lot of time ahead...do not worry about it you will figure it out soon..!!"

"huh..ok!"

My days so far...

2009-07-23T23:37:00.024-04:00

Yes..I'm writing from Pune...and it feels great!! NO school and complete FREEDOM..its been a week now since I landed on the Indian Subcontinent..I mean India and specifically Mumbai and Pune..I don't get sleep these days..I await for the next day...looking forward for more fun and special moments..In short my vacation till now....

I was in mumbai for like 2 days when I arrived..to attend a marriage ceremony..for like the first time I guess..I LOVED MUMBAI!! usually I don't like it cause of its massive crowd and pollution..but this time returning to India after 7months..it feels amazing!! I don't wanna leave my country!! Anyway..I DID travel in the local train..after i guess a year!?!? The new ones are great! and loads of improvement!! In breif..I shopped..met few relatives...got wet in the monsoon rains..and had loads of fun! but wait there's more...........

Finally we left for Pune on Sunday....on the way I got a lot of calls from my friends who were waiting for me since 9 a.m!! and I reached at around 3 and...all of them came screaming..it felt so awesome..and I yet couldn't believe that I WAS IN PUNE!! the day passed by pretty fast..we took loads of pictures..then at the end when me and my 2 best friends were left,we took MORE pictures and talked like crazy..and my best friend..-Sejal and me wore same tops with different colours and gave each other gifts we bought for each other..etc...it was AMAZING!! I couldn't wait for the very next day cause there was more to come...the next morning I ACTUALLY got up at 6a.m to walk with my best friend till her bus arrived...!! and then soon when she came back from school, we were together for the rest of the day..we talked and talked..acted like total retards and kept on telling each other "I missed you so much!!" :D The following day I went over to meet some of my other friends..which was great and some of them have CHANGED a lot..in appearance:) we spent the time talking .. walking..and stuff!! wait there's still more....lol..yea then in short the next 2 days..I spent time with my best friend and my siblings...we went on late night drive..watched ice age3 and we have CAD B almost everyday!! Its a chocolate shake which is so very tempting..and I AM THINKING OF LOOSING WEIGHT!!?? yes I am! cause I've been getting comments that I've put on weight..not FAT OK but yea PUT ON...AND I don't like it!! I'm so loosing some weight soon!! But people even said that I look and sound more matured and grown up..ha ha..of course what do you expect after 7months!!? and now very soon in a couple of hours..my parents are coming to Pune from Jeddah!! so now my family's gonna be a COMPLETE one after 7months!!

My post was randomly in brief about my days so far...if I would write on detail...It would take hours...cause now my life at the moment is perfectly PERFECT!! and there are more days to come.....2 whole months :D

Talking religion..

2009-07-23T22:41:00.005-04:00

We were born all one..and then these differences began and different religions...different people have different views and beliefs...some of these differences and beliefs lead to disputes and conflicts.

I get really irritated at people who are racist and discriminate cause of their religion or caste..and yea even colour, gender,etc..but now talking religion..why do different religious people..accuse each other!? Its very annoying and bothers me when things like that happen.Everyone has different views and different beliefs..we all have to live with these differences...why fight and create even more differences amongst ourselves...!!??

OK..now the recent thing in France about the burkha...why in a DEMOCRATIC country do we need to ban religious dressings or anything...I thought that in a democratic country..everyone is free to do what they want and practice their own religion..then why?? Its every one's personal choice..their wish to wear what they want and their covet to believe in whatever they want to believe in!

Secondly...I was reading a few blogs and stuff..and came across this person..who criticized another religion cause he/she thinks that his/her religion is the best..of course..many of us may feel like that..but that doesn't mean that you go on appraise other religions...RESPECT other religions and they respect yours..in my opinion,all religions are equal..all have their own plus and minus!

Now about majority and the minority..It sometimes happens that if a particular person does something wrong..later on if something wrong takes place..a person of the same religion is accused..it has happened a few times and its insane! I mean if that person does something wrong that doesn't mean that majority of the people belonging to the same religion are bad!? So..do good things..and prove your religion right and not baleful! Judge people for who they are and not their religion,colour,gender,caste,etc..We stay on earth TOGETHER!!! treat everyone like how you would like to be treated..!! UNITE TOGETHER..cause 'united we stand and divided we fall' :P

I found my wings...Im flying!!

2009-07-16T11:17:00.005-04:00

No...the header hardly has any connection...I just came up with anything random.So...well, the thing is that I'm leaving in about an hour for the airport...gotta get ready and set go!!I'm wearing my new top which looks really cool..with skinny jeans and maybe a hot pink and black scarf around the neck or on the neck..uh..i dunno..I'm not sure..and my favourite bag..and my new pink and black converse!!hehe yea so anyways I'll be back with my blog as soon as I reach Pune..cause I'll be in Mumbai for I guess2-3days and then Pune!! eeeeeeep!! its vacation time..and I'm gonna dance my heart off!! I wish I had my own purple or pink laptop so that I could blog and go online and do my stuff....cause the flight is gonna be long...cause its via Hyderabad:( and I'm travelling alone with my sister alone..which is not so good!! cause well she's little and they always are meant to be annoying...!! hope I have a safe journey and a fantastic vacation..2months of real happiness and fun:D see you'll soon:) muah!

Im back!!

2009-07-12T15:07:00.004-04:00

So..I'm back..though the exams ain't over yet...only 2more to go..math and MCQ science ....so nothing to learn and I can blog.Only 4 days for me to fly!! I mean for the vacations...so I'm going to India..after 7months!! I'm so excited!! I'm gonna be there for 2months and few more days..gonna join come classes of my interests to keep my time occupied during the mornings and do all that I like and be totally free..out of school and bitchiness and problems and disputes..and then later I can spend quality time with my family and friends.My family is gonna be together after 6months! :D so Its gonna be great!!I'l update almost everyday and keep my blog alive and colourful :)

Will soon be back!!

2009-07-04T02:54:00.004-04:00

I feel my writing has been very dry for the past few days..its due to the exams which start from tomorrow starting socials:) I hope I do well in all..especially science and math!! yikes!! So..well,I am grounding myself for i guess 10 to 12 days!!I'm not gonna facebook nor twitter or blog..NO INTERNET and other activities till the exams get over!! I will be back soon!! keep visiting my blog...comment ..and miss me;) and wish me luck!!

After the exams...summer vacations start here!!! I am so very excited cause I'm going back home to Pune,India after 6 months!! I'm gonna meet my sister,brother, all my friends,visit my school and have fun!!!I loads of plans for the next two months..!!

J-town!!

2009-07-03T14:11:00.009-04:00

J-town..is what people call Jeddah nowadays..

For a change..I thought of writing about Jeddah,where I stay currently.A very nice place if you stay in a good compound..have a driver...and plenty friends!For me Jeddah is perfect for shopping!I do most of my shopping here..its got huge and amazing malls!my favourite is Aziz Mall, since it has most of the shops I like.All the malls have splendid food courts and mini amusement parks.

Jeddah use to be my favourite when I came here for vacations before..we went shopping almost everyday,met my old friends and enjoyed with them in the amusement parks.

Corniche is one of the best part about Jeddah....especially during a pleasant weather.It stretches over a long distance..the waves and the view is beautiful and very pleasant.The Jeddah fountain too is a wonderful view...even from a faraway distance!During the weekends its filled with people...and when football matches are going on...omg! the Arabs..get their mini television sets along..and its well...a very different view! you don't get to see it everywhere!

Jeddah is a part of Saudi Arabia..therefore its a religious place..women are to be wearing aabayas of their choice.But many people picture the 'abaya' to be very simple and black...its not like that! Here you can see variety of designs and patterns of abayas...Among the teenage girls, you can usually see the new butterfly ones..or big hanging sleeves are very common these days.Teenage girls wear it with full on STYLE!! some of them do not wear the head-scarf,their hair is open or tied in various different styles.They pair perfect converse with their abayas and not to forget..the MAKEUP!! very important!! mainly nail polish,eye-liner and kaajal and ofcourse lip gloss!!on the other hand the ladies dress in a very classy manner! You can see both traditional and usual ladies.Most of them wear the abaya in a very decent manner and what i have noticed these days is that many of them match their sandals and bags smartly!! Fashion here might not be like what it is everywhere..its quite different and very nice! The traditional ladies mostly wear the veil..and beautiful eye makeup!! the ladies here look very elegant and beautiful in their own style.I admire them for that.

The only thing Jeddah lacks is FREEDOM!! actually Saudi Arabia lacks!! and that's what I hate about it..! But as they say..everything has its plus and minus...so we have to keep up with that.I think that they should become a democratic country..it might be difficult for a year or so, but after a certain point of time..it will be fine.I like Jeddah,since I had stayed here for the first 7years of my life and now again I'm spending the starting of my teenage years in Jeddah...Its a really nice place on its own.